It widely acknowledged that the most popular punishment for law-breakers is prison sentence.. On the one hand, there are some reasons why providing adequate education can help resolve th
Trang 1Thursday, April 13, 2017
Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime
However, a more effective solution is to provide people with a better education Agree or disagree.
It widely acknowledged that the most popular punishment for law-breakers is prison sentence However, I totally agree with those who hold the view that education would be much better to deal with crimes
On the one hand, there are some reasons why providing adequate education can help resolve the problem of crime Firstly, this measure may enhance the awareness of individuals towards the negative consequences of offending For example, local councils can send some policemen
to schools to talk about crimes’ punishments and how to prevent them This will certainly make people scared of breaking the rules, helping reduce the problem of crime Secondly, a majority of ex-criminals tend to recommit offenses due to some reasons such as being
unemployed This can be solved by proving them knowledge and skills to be able to earn their own money
On the other hand, putting troublemakers in jail may bring several detrimental outcomes To begin with, when being together, prisoners may have more time to talk to each other and may plan to commit another offense after coming back to the community As a result, the crime rate will rise even when the government has been applying this type of punishment In
addition, if we just force criminals to serve a prison sentence, they will be unlikely to change and thus continue to behave anti-socially For instance, a robber is likely to rob other people after his sentence is over, which is because he has not learned any good things in prison so he becomes the same person as he was again and again
In conclusion, it seems to me that prison is not the best way to cope with crimes, and that it would be more effective to educate individuals to solve the issues
Evaluation Report
the incorrect expressions have marred the comprehensibility of the ideas at times Paragraphing is skillfully managed; however, incoherent structures are found in writing The range of vocabulary is adequate only, and there is a lot of scope for improvement in word
© IELTS-Blog.com - All Rights Reserved ● Web: http://www.ielts-blog.com
Trang 2Thursday, April 13, 2017
choice, word formation, and vocabulary Also, a mix of simple and complex structures is used, but, there is a lot
of scope for improvement in grammar and structures too
as some expressions are found to be incorrect
Estimated Band Score 7.0
improvements in writing Your writing is good;
however, you need to write with more clarity
2 Revise grammar.
3 Learn more vocabulary and improve upon the formation of words and structures
4 Always proofread the task response after finishing it.
5 Keep practicing to improve your performance.
IELTS preparation e-books - download a free trial here Sample essays, letters and reports - click here
Learn vocabulary from this link - http://www.scribd.com/doc/244244/Check-your-Vocabulary-for-IELTS
www.ielts-blog.com
marked for you in balloons on the right side of your task text.
If you can't see the balloons, please change your Word settings as follows:
1 Click View -> Print Layout in the main menu
© IELTS-Blog.com - All Rights Reserved ● Web: http://www.ielts-blog.com
Trang 3Thursday, April 13, 2017
2 Click View->Markup in the main menu.
You should now see comments appearing in balloons on the right side:
© IELTS-Blog.com - All Rights Reserved ● Web: http://www.ielts-blog.com