IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: SENTENCE VARIETY II: Combining Sentences Provide variety in your paragraphs by writing sentences of different lengths.. IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: SENTENCE VARIETY
Trang 1IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: SENTENCE VARIETY II: Combining Sentences Provide variety in your paragraphs by writing sentences of different lengths
In this exercise, you’ll practice combining sentences in two different ways
•You can use a conjunction to combine two short sentences into one
compound sentence
EXAMPLE:
SHORT SENTENCES : Blast-off time arrived The rocket engines did not fire.
COMBINED SENTENCE : Blast-off time arrived, but the rocket engines did not fire.
A. Combine each pair of sentences below into one sentence Use the
conjunction shown in parentheses to join the sentences Write the new
sentence on the line (Be sure to add a comma before the conjunction when you write a compound sentence.) The first one has been done for you
1 Elaine and Paul Lavine have a huge house They only have one child
(but)
2 Seven Great Danes live in the Lavine house Two will soon have puppies
(and)
3 The family may keep all the puppies Neighbors may buy some
(or) _
•You can also combine sentences by writing a descriptive phrase In the
following example, the descriptive phrase is shown in italics
EXAMPLE:
SHORT SENTENCES : We visited Thrill World It is the most exciting
amusement park in the state
COMBINED SENTENCE : We visited Thrill World, the most exciting
amusement park in the state
B. Combine each pair of sentences into one sentence Turn one of the
sentences into a descriptive phrase The first one has been done for you
1 Yoki will star in the class play She is an excellent actress
2 A stage crew is designing sets Crew members are talented artists
3 Tickets for the play are going fast The play opens March 5
Elaine and Paul Lavine have a huge house , but they only have one child.
Yoki , an excellent actress , will star in the class play.
Trang 2IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: SENTENCE VARIETY III: Avoiding “And” Sentences Sometimes student writers overuse the conjunction and This makes paragraphs sound repetitious Just a slight change in sentence pattern can add variety
EXAMPLES:
Five minutes before game time the center arrived,
and he was still wearing his street clothes.
Five minutes before game time the center, still
wearing his street clothes, arrived.
A. One sentence in each pair has been improved by
eliminating the word and Read both sentences.
Then circle the letter of the improved sentence
1 a Abraham Lincoln was a man of dignity and
honesty, and he is remembered as a great president
b Because Abraham Lincoln was a man of dignity and honesty,
he is remembered as a great president
2 a Although the sign said, “No food allowed,” Bobby entered the
library with an ice cream cone
b The sign said, “No food allowed,” and Bobby entered the library
with an ice cream cone
B. Rewrite the paragraph so that it uses the word and to connect
sentences no more than twice Hint: Separate some sentences and
avoid writing too many long ones!
The bald eagle is a symbol of the United States, and it is also an
endangered animal Hunters and ranchers have killed many eagles, and chemicals and pesticides are polluting the birds’ environment The bald
eagle is a proud and noble bird, and its picture is on the Great Seal of
the United States and the President’s flag and some coins, and it is
important that Americans protect the species.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _
Trang 3IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: CONCISE WRITING
We say that writing is concise when it does not waste words Every word in a
concise sentence has a purpose Every sentence in a paragraph presents a
new idea to support the main point
A. The sentences in the first column have words and phrases that add no
new meaning Draw lines to match a wordy sentence in the first column with a more concise version in the second column
1 The faulty vehicle of which I am
the driver seems to present me
with the challenging problem of
veering to the left side of the road
on which I’m driving
2 As the vehicle’s operator, I feel
a certain sense of responsibility
to myself and my riders to drive
the vehicle to a mechanic’s garage
and have problems diagnosed and
repaired
3 Unfortunately, my bank account
is extremely low, and I lack the
needed funds to properly attend to
my vehicle’s need for prompt service
4 Perhaps I will appeal to the good
nature of my father to advance me
a sum of money with which to make
the repairs and satisfy my debts
a Unfortunately, I don’t have enough money to pay for the repairs
b My car veers to the left
c Maybe I’ll ask Dad for
a loan to cover the car repairs
d I need to take my car
to a garage and get it fixed
B. Read the paragraph below Draw a line through
the four unnecessary sentences that repeat ideas
Walt Disney has been called the Master of
Make-Believe He began his career by bringing
drawings to life in short cartoons called Laugh-O-Grams.
This launched his career Before long, he was off to Hollywood.
There he found success with a seven-minute cartoon of Alice in
Wonderland The cartoon did well It was not long before Walt created
a funny little mouse he called Mortimer The rodent was very humorous.
Walt’s wife Lillian didn’t like the mouse’s name She thought it was not the right choice She renamed the mouse Mickey.
Trang 4IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: AVOIDING MIXED COMPARISONS Writers often make comparisons to help their readers picture an idea
pounded like a jackhammer.
Good writers are careful to avoid mixed comparisons
night-owls who studied until dawn.
A. Decide whether each sentence below is a good comparison or a mixed
comparison Put a checkmark (✓) by the three mixed comparisons
1 _ Perspiration cascaded down his face like little waterfalls
2 _ The chicken-hearted villain was as timid as a kitten
3 _ When Leroy laughed, his Adam’s apple bobbed like a rowboat
on a lake
4 _ As David climbed the ladder of success, he sailed through
rough seas
B. The sentences below contain mixed comparisons Rewrite each
sentence so that it does not shift from one comparison to another
The first one has been done for you
1 Mario was a tower of strength and would not melt away in the face of danger
2 His mind galloped from thought to thought like leaves in the wind
3 The warmth of the sun wrapped itself around our campsite like a blazing fire
4 The teacher growled at the tardy students like a thunderstorm
CHALLENGE: Write three descriptive sentences on the back of this sheet Use
a comparison in each sentence—but be sure to avoid mixed comparisons!
Here are some topic suggestions: waves crashing on the beach, a graveyard, a cornfield, a crowded concert hall, your school cafeteria, a snake.
Mario was a tower of strength who would not crumble in the face of danger.
Trang 5IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: RECOGNIZING FACTS AND OPINIONS
It is important for writers to recognize whether they
are presenting a fact or an opinion Remember that
a fact can be checked out and proven right or wrong
An opinion cannot be verified—not every reader
would agree that it is right or wrong
EXAMPLES:
FACT : The concert began at 7:00 P M
(Check the clock to prove this true.)
OPINION : The band gave a disappointing performance.
(Would everyone in the audience agree with this?)
A. All the following items except one are accurate or inaccurate statements
of fact Each fact can be evaluated as true or false Write T for true or F
for false by each factual statement Look for the one statement that is
not a fact Circle the statement and put an O for opinion on the line.
1 _ The Fourth of July is always celebrated on July 5
2 _ A fireworks display is the best way to celebrate
3 _ The United States is in the western hemisphere
4 _ Rhode Island is the largest state
5 _ California has a larger population than Nevada
B. Write F for fact or O for opinion beside each statement below.
Remember, not everything you agree with is a fact (You should
find two statements of fact and three statements of opinion.)
1 _ The most important feature in a car is its fuel efficiency
2 _ The most important feature in a car is engine power
3 _ A new model, the Zephyr, has an eight-cylinder engine
4 _ There are eight new courtroom dramas on television this fall
5 _ There are too many shows about lawyers on television
CHALLENGE: Select one of the following topics: a healthy diet; Paris, France;
your next-door neighbor; soda pop; leash laws; sales tax; the common
cold; modern art; teen curfews On the back of this sheet, write one
statement of fact and one statement of opinion about the topic
Trang 6IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: QUALIFYING OPINIONS Good writers know the difference between a fact and an
opinion To make it clear that they are giving their opinion,
writers use qualifying words like “in my opinion” or “I think.”
Such words limit a statement and make it less strong
EXAMPLE:
DON ’ T WRITE : Golf is a rather dull sport.
DO WRITE : In my opinion, golf is a rather dull sport.
A. Some of the following statements of opinion are qualified
Others are not Underline the qualifying words and phrases where
you find them Put a checkmark (✓) beside the unqualified opinions
1 _ Brenda is cute
2 _ Mike thinks Brenda is cute
3 _ Alex wasted his money on a silk shirt that is not washable
4 _ In my opinion, cotton is the most practical fabric
5 _ I think cotton is comfortable and easy to wash
6 _ Cotton is better than wool or rayon
B. Read the statements below Circle the numbers of the three opinions
that need to be qualified Then rewrite the three statements you selected
on the lines Use qualifying words to make them better sentences
1 Every student can benefit from a physical education class
2 Midtown High requires all freshmen and sophomores to take P.E
3 Mr and Mrs Wilson have overly strict rules for their children
4 No amount of arguing will convince the Wilsons to change their minds!
5 The Wilsons insist that their kids finish their homework before dinner
CHALLENGE: On the back of this sheet, write a topic sentence that could begin
a persuasive paragraph Present your opinion in the topic sentence, and be sure to qualify it Topic suggestions: laws requiring bikers to wear helmets, oil drilling in the Alaska wilderness, school dress codes, the president.
Trang 7IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: MAKING AND QUALIFYING GENERALIZATIONS Writers often make broad statements that apply to a large number of instances When writers generalize, they must keep in mind that there may be exceptions Most general statements need to be qualified
QUALIFYING WORDS
some many may apparently almost sometimes several most might probably likely supposedly generally usually it seems seems to often
A. Qualify these generalizations by adding words from the chart
1 teens love to shop
2 animals have strong hunting instincts
3 Rugby is the roughest of all sports
4 People who get up early get more done in a day
B. Writers qualify most statements about the future Rewrite each
prediction, using a qualifying word(s) from the chart The first one
has been done for you
1 Next year, America will ship tons of food to needy countries
2 Annmarie will make a good doctor some day
3 At the tournament, our debate team will be hard to beat!
4 Our house will need a new roof in three to five years
5 The growing population will lead to overcrowding
CHALLENGE: What general statement could you make about the people
in your class? (Think about something most have in common, such as
a favorite kind of music, favorite teacher, lunchtime complaint, etc.)
On the back of this sheet, write a sentence making the generalization
Be sure to limit your generalization with a qualifying word or words
Next year , America is likely to ship tons of food to needy countries.
Trang 8IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: WORD CHOICES When you write, the first word that comes to mind may not be the best choice Search your mind for colorful and specific word choices Always aim to create a clear picture for your reader
A. Think about the ideas and feelings that readers associate with certain
words Circle the word that is the best choice for the sentence
1 The great white stallion ( pranced / shuffled ) around the ring
2 The angry hound showed his teeth and ( yipped / growled ) at the burglar
3 “You have a very ( old / mature ) attitude for a teenager,” Haley’s boss complimented her
4 The advertisement read: Inn by the Sea offers ( moderate / cheap ) rates and ( weird / quaint ) furnishings.
5 “Please, somebody save me!” Heidi ( screamed / said )
B. This activity should stretch your mind and generate word choices
One word heads each section of the chart Write as many other words
as you can think of that mean the same or nearly the same thing as
the heading You are likely to find that the more you stretch your mind,
the more specific and interesting the words become Compare your
completed list with a classmate’s
CHALLENGE: When you’ve exhausted your own ideas for each word, check a
thesaurus (a special dictionary listing words with similar meanings).
Look up each word on the chart Add a few words you find to your lists
Mark words you found in the thesaurus with a T.
Trang 9IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: NEW BEGINNINGS Paragraphs often begin with a topic sentence that expresses the main idea
of the paragraph A good topic sentence gives enough information to catch
readers’ interest Here are some hints about writing strong topic sentences:
•Get right to the point and avoid unnecessary words.
•Prompt curiosity Give your readers just enough information to tempt them to stay with you.
•Create a vivid picture to interest readers.
A. Read each pair of topic sentences Which one
would make you more eager to read the paragraph?
Circle the letter of the better sentence
1 a In Chicago’s Natural History Museum
stands a model of the dodo—perhaps
the craziest- looking bird that ever lived
b In this paragraph I am going to tell you
about an extinct bird called the dodo
2 a I went to the city pound and adopted a homeless dog named Pogo
b When Pogo blinked his brown eyes and lifted a skinny paw, I knew the pound puppy had found a home
3 a Strange things happened the night the lights went out in Bay City
b One night a storm knocked out all the power in Bay City
4 a There are many reasons we need to solve the problem of
homelessness, and I am going to tell you about some of them
b Imagine icy winds howling as you curl up on a park bench, and
you’ll realize we need to solve the problem of homelessness
B. Rewrite each item below Make sure the topic is directly stated and the
sentence serves to interest the reader
1 I think monkeys are interesting animals
2 I am supposed to write about my favorite relative, so here goes
Trang 10
IMPROVING YOUR WRITING: EFFECTIVE ENDINGS The sentence that ends a paragraph is often a summary or conclusion
A conclusion is a judgment based on the evidence presented A summary
is a statement that repeats the main idea The final sentence usually does
not add new information to the paragraph It lets the reader know that the
paragraph is coming to an end
A. Read each paragraph Then circle the letter of the best ending sentence
1 I believe my neighbors are in
danger each time they leave
their homes They could trip
on the cracks in our crumbling
sidewalks Dead tree limbs
hanging over walkways seem
ready to crash down Many
street lights are burned out.
a Without improvements, life
in our neighborhood is an accident waiting to happen!
b Many neighbors leave toys
and tools on the sidewalk in front of their houses
c There are, however, many
nice things about our neighborhood
2 My nine-year-old nephew Nick
is trying to make a decision about his future On Monday he wanted to be a cowboy and ride
a galloping stallion The next day
he considered fire fighting and pictured himself on a racing red truck By Wednesday, Nick was thinking about flying a jet plane.
a I think Nick likes the hats that pilots wear
b On Thursday Nick announced he wanted
to be a weatherman
c Luckily, Nick has plenty
of time to decide what to
do with his life
B. Writers sometimes use a transition in a paragraph’s final sentence
These words clue the reader that the sentence is a summary Circle
the three words or phrases that suggest a conclusion
CHALLENGE: Read the following paragraph Then, on the back of this sheet,
add a concluding sentence that restates—or summarizes—the main idea
When Eleanor Roosevelt became first lady, she shocked the country.
Presidents’ wives were expected to hostess gatherings in the White House— and little else! Eleanor, however, traveled the country She talked to people about their problems She wrote magazine and newspaper articles and gave radio talks She spoke out for people others had forgotten: old people, poor people, minorities, and women.