Student Loans (Objs. 1–3)
Consumer Team Web
Sarah was all smiles when she graduated and got that degree in her hand. Soon, however, she began to worry about her student loans.
Student debt has risen 58 percent in the last decade, according to the College Board, a New York–based college testing and informa- tion firm. One study showed that about one third of all recent gradu- ates are unprepared to make their first student loan payment.15
Your Task. In teams collect information about student debt. Who has it? How much debt does an average student carry? How do most students repay their loans? What strategies are proposed for helping
Writing Improvement Exercises
5.11 Sentence Elements (Obj. 4)
Your Task. Identify the following groups of words using these abbreviations: independent clause (IC), dependent clause (DC), or phrase(s) (P). For clauses, circle the subject.
a. if your degree is in accounting.
b. you can expect a starting salary of $45,000 c. in the first six months on the job
d. when you are performing multiple tasks requiring your undivided attention
e. your brain can become overloaded
f. of the key components to increasing personal energy g. because multitasking is a skill that can be learned h. to do in a more efficient manner with less stress 5.12 Active and Passive Voice (Obj. 4)
Your Task. On a separate sheet, convert the verbs in the follow- ing sentences from passive voice to active voice. Notice that you shift the emphasis in the sentence by using passive voice. Be ready to discuss what is effective and ineffective about using passive voice.
Passive voice: Employees are encouraged by the company to par- ticipate in volunteer programs.
Active voice: The company encourages employees to participate in volunteer programs.
a. The first digital camera was introduced by Kodak back in 1996.
b. Digital imaging was not ignored by Kodak executives, but it was not taken seriously.
c. Every new Ford vehicle is transported from the factory floor to the dealer’s lot by UPS.
d. Repair of your computer cannot be authorized because the warranty period has expired.
e. An all-Hispanic supermercado was built in Houston by the giant grocer Kroger.
Now convert the following active-voice verbs to passive-voice verbs.
Notice how you can de-emphasize the doer if desired. Be ready to discuss which version is more effective.
Active voice: We accept returned merchandise only when custom- ers provide a sales receipt.
Passive voice: Returned merchandise is accepted only when a sales receipt is provided.
f. We cannot give you a cash refund for merchandise that you purchased 90 or more days ago.
g. St. Elizabeth’s Hospital does not admit patients who are uninsured.
h. Jeremy Jones made a significant costing error in the distributed annual report.
i. Our company provides café-style restaurants for employees in corporate buildings.
j. General Dynamics established interoffice shuttles to improve its transportation system.
5.13 Dangling and Misplaced Modifiers (Obj. 4) Your Task. On a separate sheet, revise the following sentences to correct any dangling or misplaced modifiers. Add subjects as needed, but retain the introductory phrases. Mark C if correct.
a. To find a good job, your résumé must be targeted to the desired position.
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students avoid, reduce, and repay educational loans? As a group, discuss your findings. Brainstorm for additional strategies. Then organize your findings into an outline with a title, an introduction, and recommendations for helping current students avoid, reduce, and repay their student loans. Submit your outline to your instructor.
b. Skilled at designing brochures, the contract was awarded to ExpoArts.
c. Ignoring the warning prompt on the screen, the computer was turned off resulting in the loss of data.
d. Using a number of creative search terms, the Web site was finally found.
e. By working as a temporary employee, your chance of permanent employment is greatly improved.
f. Acting as team leader, the meeting was organized and led by Matt.
g. To prevent head injuries, wear a helmet when cycling. (Tricky!) h. The presidential candidate announced her intention to run for
national office in her hometown of Pleasantville, New Jersey.
5.14 Transitional Expressions (Obj. 5)
Your Task. Insert transitions to improve the flow of ideas (coherence) in the following paragraphs. Consider transitions such as consequently, for example, however, on the contrary, moreover, and therefore.
a. The phrase “a good excuse” falsely implies a difference between good and bad excuses. All excuses are bad. They are unaccept- able. A reason is a legitimate, truthful account of a situation.
b. We recognize that giving your time to important causes is just as important as giving your money. We’ve created several programs that make it easy and rewarding for our employees to get involved.
c. Our database file includes all customer contact information. It provides space for name, address, phone, e-mail, and other vital information. It has an area for comments, a feature that comes in handy and helps us keep our records up-to-date.
d. No one likes to turn out poor products. We began highlighting recurring problems. Employees make a special effort to be more careful in doing their work right the first time. Their work does not have to be returned to them for corrections.
5.15 Paragraph Organization (Obj. 5)
Your Task. The following poorly organized paragraphs follow the indirect plan. Decide what the main idea is in each paragraph.
Then revise each paragraph so that it is organized directly. Improve coherence by using the techniques described in this chapter.
a. Logos, business stationery, business cards, Web sites, and Power- Point presentations would benefit from a polished professional image. Small businesses should consider investing in a graphic designer for important visual communications. Professional graphic designers can be helpful to both large and small busi- nesses. Large corporations have the resources to hire graphic designers to help with key projects. These projects might include corporate brochures and annual reports.
b. Many of our customers limp through their business workdays de- spite problems with their disk drives, printers, and peripherals. We cannot service their disk drives, printers, and peripherals. These customers are unable to go without this equipment long enough for the repair. We’ve learned that there are two times when we can get to that equipment. We can do our repairs in the middle of the night or on Sunday. All of our staff of technicians now work every Sunday. Please authorize additional funds for my depart- ment to hire technicians for night and weekend service hours.
c. Air express is one of the ways SturdyBilt power mowers and chain saws may be delivered. Air express promises two-day delivery but at a considerable cost. The cheapest method is for retail- ers to pick up shipments themselves at our nearest distribution center. We have distribution centers in St. Louis, Phoenix, and Los Angeles. Another option involves having our trucks deliver the shipment from our distribution center to the retailer’s door for an additional fee. These are the options SturdyBilt provides for the retailers purchasing our products.
5.16 Sentence Length (Obj. 4)
Your Task. Break the following sentences into shorter sen- tences. Use appropriate transitional expressions.
a. If firms have a substantial investment in original research or development of new products, they should consider protecting those products with patents, although all patents eventually expire and what were once trade secrets can become common knowledge in the industry.
b. As soon as consumers recognize a name associated with a prod- uct or service, that name is entitled to legal protection as a trade- mark; in fact, consumers may even create a trademark where none existed or create a second trademark by using a nickname as a source indicator, such as the name “Coke,” which was legally protected even before it had ever been used by the company.
c. Although no magic formula exists for picking a good trademark name, firms should avoid picking the first name that pops into someone’s head; moreover, they should be aware that unique and arbitrary marks are best, whereas descriptive terms such as
“car” or “TV repair” are useless, and surnames and geographic names are weak because they lack distinction and exclusivity.
Video Resources Video Library 1
Mastering Guffey’s 3-x-3 Writing Process
If you didn’t see the video Mastering Guffey’s 3-x-3 Writing Process when you studied Chapter 4, your instructor may show it with this chapter. It shows all three phases of the writing process so that you can see how it guides the development of a complete message. This video illustrates concepts in Chapters 4, 5, and 6.
Grammar and Mechanics C.L.U.E. Review 5
Commas
Review Guides 21–26 about commas in Appendix A: Grammar and Mechanics Guide (Competent Language Usage Essentials), beginning on page A-9. On a separate sheet, revise the following sentences to correct errors in comma usage. For each error that you locate, write the guide number and abbreviation that reflects this usage. The more you recognize the reasons, the better you will learn these punctuation guidelines. If a sentence is correct, write C. When you finish, check your answers on page Key-2.
Guide 21, CmSer Guide 24, CmDate (Comma, dates, (Comma series) addresses, geographical names, etc.) Guide 22, CmIntr Guide 25, CmIn (Comma, internal (Comma introductory) sentence interrupters)
Guide 23, CmConj (Comma conjunction)
Example: When we use company e-mail we know our messages are monitored.
Revision: When we use company e-mail, we know our messages are monitored. [Guide 22, CmIntr]
1. Informal research methods include looking in the files, talking with your boss and interviewing the target audience.
2. When you prepare to write any message you need to anticipate the audience’s reaction.
3. By learning to distinguish between dependent and independent clauses you will be able to avoid serious sentence faults.
4. Some business messages require sensitivity and writers may prefer to use passive-voice instead of active-voice verbs.
5. We hired Davida Rivera who was the applicant with the best qualifications as our new marketing manager.
6. Our business was incorporated on August 1, 2003 in Phoenix Arizona.
7. The new business by the way is flourishing and is expected to show a profit soon.
8. After he graduates Dustin plans to move to Atlanta and find work there.
9. Last fall our company introduced policies regulating the use of cell phones instant messaging and e-mail on the job.
10. The problem with many company telecommunication policies is that the policies are self-policing and never enforced.
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Chapter 6