Characters : Santa Claus, Elf, Reindeer up to 9Setting : Santa’s house at the North Pole; the Slim Up Center Scene 1: Santa is standing in front of the mirror looking at himself, patting
Trang 1Characters : Santa Claus, Elf, Reindeer (up to 9)
Setting : Santa’s house at the North Pole; the Slim Up Center
(Scene 1: Santa is standing in front of the mirror looking at himself, patting his belly and flexing his biceps.)
Santa : Ho, ho, ho Look at me 350 pounds of pure, lean muscle Wow.
Elf : (coming through the door) Hey, Fatso, it’s time to go You still have 3 million
presents to deliver before tomorrow morning
Santa : (angry) Hey, hey, hey! What did you just call me, you little weasel? Who are
you calling fat? I’m not fat I’m in top shape In fact, I think I’ve never looked better before I’m a lean, mean present machine
Elf : (shaking his head) Yeah, yeah, whatever, Santa
Let’s just go The reindeer and the sleigh are ready to roll
Santa : Okay, let’s go then (Santa is going to the sleigh)
Rudolph: Good heavens Look at Santa He’s getting fatter
every day Do we really have to pull the sleigh with all those
presents AND him? I might pull a muscle
Dancer: You’re right; Santa’s not getting any slimmer
Comet: Listen guys I have an idea (The reindeer stand in a circle with their heads
together whispering) Why don’t we take Santa to the Slim Up Center?
Prancer: The Slim Up Center? Isn’t that terribly expensive? And we don’t have any
money How can we afford that?
Vixen: We could give them some presents instead Maybe they’ll be okay with that Cupid : Okay, that’s a very good idea Let’s go then Santa, are you ready?
Santa : Sure guys Let’s go (Sleigh drives off After a few minutes Santa notices it’s
going the wrong way) Hey guys, where are we going?
Donner: Well, Santa, we can’t pull your weight any longer We think it’s time for you
to go on a diet
Santa : A diet? What are you talking about? I’m as thin as a stick!
Blitzen: Well, a giant stick, Santa Just face it You need to lose some weight.
Santa : But I don’t want to…
Dasher: No buts, Santa There’s no way out Hurry up guys, we’re almost there.
Trang 2(Scene 2: At the Slim Up Center)
Rudolph: Listen, Santa The girl at the reception gave me this list of questions you
need to fill in Don’t worry; we’ll help you with it First question: What do you usually have for breakfast?
Santa : Breakfast? Let me see I have 12 slices of toast with marmalade.
Dancer: (Surprised) Twelve slice of toast?
Santa : Six sausages.
Comet: (Shocked) Six sausages?
Santa : Eight eggs.
Prancer: (Surprised) Eight eggs?
Santa : And four cups of coffee with lots of milk and sugar.
Vixen : (Shocked) Four cups of coffee? With lots of sugar?
Cupid : Don’t you eat any fruit, Santa?
Santa : Fruit? What do you think I am? A monkey? Monkeys eat fruit.
Donner: But Santa, fruit is really good for you You should try it Okay, next question:
What do you have for lunch?
Santa : Lunch? Well, I usually have six pieces of fried chicken.
Blitzen: (Surprised) Six pieces?
Santa : French fries and cola Supersized, of course And a big ice-cream for dessert Dasher: (Shocked) Supersized? Big ice-cream? Don’t you eat any vegetables, Santa? Santa : Vegetables? What do you think I am? A rabbit? Rabbits eat vegetables.
Rudolph: But Santa, vegetables are really good for you They keep you fit.
Santa : Yeah right Next you’re going to tell me exercise is good for me Hah.
Dancer: But it is, Santa Last question: What do you have for dinner?
Santa : Not much I don’t eat that much for dinner Just a pizza and a soda.
Comet: Would that be a family-sized pizza, Santa? And a bucket of soda?
Santa : Yes, of course What do you think I am? A supermodel?
Prancer: Okay, that’s it I’ll hand in the questionnaire and see what they say
Santa : Well, hurry up, I’m getting hungry.
Trang 3Vixen : (Comes back) Right, Santa The bad news is that you are quite a bit
overweight The good news is that you can start your programme immediately
Unfortunately, you’ll have to stay here until you’ve lost 150 pounds
Santa : (Unbelieving) Stay here? Lose 150 pounds? How long will that take?
Cupid : Well, they were not really sure how long it would take, but they thought we
should be able to pick you in three years or so
Santa : (Getting angry) In three years? But…
Donner: Not buts, Santa We’re doing this for your own good We’ll ask the Elves to
find a substitute Santa
Santa : (Getting angrier) A substitute Santa? But there’s only one Santa Me!
Donner: Not buts, Santa And please don’t get upset, you might get a heart attack Santa : (speechless) But…
Reindeer (all together): Merry Christmas, Santa Goodbye! (Reindeer wave goodbye
and ride off, leaving a depressed Santa behind)
The End