THE CHALLENGERS POCKET BOOK phần 9 potx

When you feel trapped by a question, first reflect back what you think the participant was asking, then ask HIM/HER.. Example: Participant: 'What do you think of the new Mini Disk system

3 TYPES OF REFLECTION

1 CHERRY-PICKING

Take part of the intervention only and reflect it back

G 'Let's first take your remark on XYZ You feel that ?'

2 INTERPRETING

Reflect back your version of what the challenger said

G 'If I understand correctly, your problem/question is ?'

3 PROVOKING

Reflect back an even stronger version of the implied attack, criticism or 'heckle' to

provoke a climb down or, at least, a diluted restatement of aggression

G 'So you're saying that XYZ really made you furious?' (Hoping for, 'Well, not

exactly furious, but I do think ')

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3 TYPES OF DEFLECTION

1 RETURN TO SENDER

80% of questions and challenges are not what they appear They are requests for the spotlight When you feel trapped by a question, first reflect back what you think the participant was asking, then ask HIM/HER You can then comment on their

opinion or deflect to the group

Example:

Participant: 'What do you think of the new Mini Disk system?'

Leader: 'Ah, you obviously feel it will have an impact on the other developments ?'

2 RICOCHET

Deflect your reflection to ONE other participant:

G 'Bill, you work in that department, how do you feel about ?'

3 PEER PRESSURE

Deflect your reflection to the whole group for comment:

G 'How do the rest of you feel ?'

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Whenever a discussion starts to wander or when you are under pressure (from the clock

or from a participant) refocus by diverting the group's attention to something else

G Distribute a handout

G Switch on the overhead projector

G Go to the flip chart and write something

G (If you are seated) Get up and spread your hands out, palms down

G Use emphatic 'Right!' 'OK!'

G Find a verbal bridge or link to the next point Interrupt the participant(s) by saying

something like: 'Yes, that's important because ' (link to next point)

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4 TYPES OF REFRAME

Reframing consists of cutting a

challenging intervention short by

getting the participant to consider their

remarks from a different point of view or 'frame'

1 RELEVANCE

Asking participants to consider the

relevance of what they are saying to the

point being discussed!

G 'Help me to see how this fits in with

what we've been discussing.'

2 HELICOPTER

Agreeing that one can look at the problem from that angle but showing them another view (from the other side of the helicopter)

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4 TYPES OF REFRAME (Cont’d)

3 TABLE-TURNING

Turning a tricky situation to your advantage by

reframing the premise of the challenge

G Ronald Reagan, when attacked on

his age by a journalist during the

final debate with Mondale, said:

'I will not make age an issue of this

campaign I refuse to exploit for

political purposes my opponent's

youth and inexperience.'

G Churchill, when Lady Astor said: 'If

you were my husband, I'd put

poison in your wine', retorted:

'Madam, if I were your husband,

4 TYPES OF REFRAME (Cont'd)

4 CONSEQUENCES

When participants are griping about the organisation/the boss/the course, etc reframe the consequences of

what they are saying:

G 'You are obviously very unhappy working

here and I can understand why you don't think this course is relevant or applicable

to your jobs Please help me to draw up

a list of reasons why you think we're wasting our time here, so I can present it

to my management We could save a lot

of money!'

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This is a technique which shouldn't be used as a technique! It should come naturally

There are two general challenging situations in which self-revelation is effective:

G When you have been criticised or attacked For example: 'I feel hurt by that remark I'm sorry I don't know how to respond to that kind of criticism.'

G When you need to show empathy for someone who is expressing deep feelings

For example: 'I know how you must have felt I remember my own experience very well It '

Your honesty and openness will demonstrate a vulnerability which will defuse aggression and generate warmth - as long as it doesn't become a behavioural habit

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3RD PERSON PERSUASION

DEFINITION

A series of techniques based on Milton Erikson's psychotherapy - helping a participant resolve a problem by giving an example of how a non-threatening 3rd person found a solution This person may be real or fictitious

The 3rd person gambit removes the threat of having to follow the teacher's advice It makes it easier for the problem poser to turn suggestions into his/her OWN solutions without losing face

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3RD PERSON PERSUASION

1 ANECDOTES

Faced with a 'yes-butting' solution-seeker, admit that you can't help Later, recount an

anecdote which is relevant to the problem but don't overtly point out the link Try and

keep the hidden advice distant from the participant in question

Example:

'We were talking yesterday about XYZ and it reminded me of something a friend of

mine told me about one of his relations Apparently '

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