Lesson 27: Writing the Independent Response 683 Introduction 1 If there were no zoos, some species of animals would not exist at all.. This introduction begins with a strong, rather sta
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EXERCISE 26.3 Focus: Using the vocabulary of showing preference and connecting ideas
Directions: Complete the following Independent Response with transition
words/phrases and with verbs that show preference For this exercise, you may use
words from the list more than one time In some cases, more than one word or
phrase may be correct
Note: You may have to change the form of the verb to fit the context of the sentence
Transition Words/Phrases
moreover furthermore on the other hand while personally
however therefore but because
Verbs of Preference
prefer would rather enjoy
Some people like to go to the same place for their vacations Other people like
to take their vacations in different places Which of these two choices do you
prefer? Give specific reasons for your choice
There are certain people who _ to take their vacations in
the same place When they return from a vacation, they ask themselves,
“When can | go back there again?” , there are people
who _ visit many places , they
————— doing many different things on their vacations When they
return from a vacation, they ask themselves, “Where can | go next and what
can | do there?”
My parents are perfect examples of the first kind of people They always go
to a lake in the mountains They first went there on their honeymoon, and sev-
eral years later they bought a vacation cabin there They have gone there two or
three times a year for over thirty years They have made friends with the people
who also own cabins there and often get together with them My mother
sailing and swimming _—_—_—_—— myfather
— to go fishing My parents like variety,
they say they can get variety by going to their cabin at different times of the
year They particularly like to go there in the autumn when the leaves are
changing color
, | feel it’s important to visit different places Of course, when | was a child, | went to my parents’ cabin with them for my vacation,
_ when | got older, | began to want to travel to many differ-
country are very crowded and expensive | go skiing in
Switzerland or in Canada My favorite subject at the university was ancient
history; , | like to visit historic places Several years ago, |
traveled to Angkor Wat in Cambodia with my uncle and aunt | also want to visit
the pyramids in Egypt; , I’d like to see Machu Picchu in Peru
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My parents believe that you can never get to know a place too well | understand their point of view , I find that going to strange places is more exciting | don’t want to go to the same place twice
the world is so huge and exciting
EXERCISE 26.4 Focus: Using the vocabulary of giving opinions and connecting ideas to write short paragraphs
DIRECTIONS: Write one-paragraph answers to the following questions, using a num- ber of the vocabulary words and phrases that are discussed in this lesson The first one is done for you
1
What was the most important decision that you have ever made? Why was this decision important to you?
| believe that the most important decision | ever made was to major in economics as an undergraduate student at my university There are several reasons why this was an important decision for me One is that my studies
at the university led to my job with the Ministry of Trade Because of my position at the Ministry, | was chosen to travel to the United States to get a master’s degree Finally, this decision was important to me because I met
my future wife in a micro-economics class at my university
If you could spend a year living in any city on the world, which city would you choose to live in? Give the reasons why you would want to live there
What do you think of this statement?
Failure often leads to success
Give an example of why you think this is sometimes true Give another exam- ple of why you think this statement is sometimes NOT true Then state your opinion of this statement
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Lesson 26: Giving Opinions and Connecting Ideas in the Independent Response 681
4 | There are many types of television shows: comedies, news programs, dramas,
reality series, and so on What is your favorite type of television show? Why do
you prefer this type of show? Give some examples from your own experiences
watching television
5 | You have received a full scholarship to a good university in your country You
have also been offered a full scholarship to a top university in another country
Which of these two scholarships would you accept? Why?
5
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y LESSON 27
WRITING THE INDEPENDENT RESPONSE
682
After spending about five minutes on pre-writing, you are now ready to get down to the real task: writing the response You have only about twenty minutes in which
to write it, and you need to produce a 200- to 300-word response That’s about ten to fifteen words a minute You can do this if you concentrate and keep working steadily
According to ETS, quality is more important than quantity in the response, but typically only longer responses get top scores A long response does not guarantee
a good score on this section, but a short response almost guarantees a low one This lesson will discuss writing all three parts of a typical response
(A) Writing the Introduction The introduction for an Independent Response can be fairly simple It does not need to be more than two or three sentences long
There are a number of functions that a good introduction can serve (but no introduction will serve all of these functions)
To get the reader's attention
To restate the ideas of the prompt
To present some general background information about the topic
To preview the main points that will appear in the response
vvvvyv To present a clear statement of the main idea of the response (This is called the thesis statement; it typically is the last sentence of the introduction, but sometimes it appears in the conclusion.)
Here are three sample introductory paragraphs, written in response to the three prompts presented in the Independent Writing Pretest and About the Independent Writing Task
Samples Prompt 1
Some people believe that zoos serve useful functions Other people believe that it is cruel and wrong to confine animals in zoos Tell which point of view you agree with and explain why, using specific details and reasons
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Introduction 1
If there were no zoos, some species of animals would not exist at all That is
one of several good reasons why | believe it is important to support zoos
Some people, however, have a negative view of zoos They think zoos are
unnatural and inhumane
This introduction begins with a strong, rather startling statement about zoos
that gets the reader's attention: “If there were no zoos, some species of animals
would not exist at all.” The writer goes on to say that she thinks it is important to
support zoos for this and other reasons However, the introduction also mentions
the opposite point of view: that zoos do not serve good purposes
Prompt 2
Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is much easier to learn in a small class than in a large one
Use specific examples and reasons to support your answer
Introduction 2
Many students believe that small classes offer much better educational -
opportunities than large ones However, in my experience, that is not neces-
sarily true | believe that, with a good teacher, a large class can provide as
good a learning opportunity as a small one
In the introduction, the writer paraphrases the prompt in the first sentence
However, in the second sentence the writer disagrees with the idea stated in the
prompt In the last sentence of the introduction, the writer gives his thesis state-
ment: learning depends on good teaching, not class size
Prompt 3
Developments in transportation such as the automobile have had an enormous
impact on modern society Choose another development in transportation that
you think is of great importance Use specific examples and reasons for your
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684 Section 4 Guide to Writing
Introduction 3
| believe that one of the most important developments in transportation has been the development of international jet transport Jet airliners first
appeared in the early 1960's Since then, planes have gotten bigger and faster and capable of flying longer distances Jet transport has had some revolutionary effects Because of the high speeds, the convenience, and the relatively low costs of this type of travel, it has changed the way people look
at the world
In the first sentence of the paragraph, the writer answers the question brought
up in the prompt The writer then goes on to provide a little background informa- tion about this development, and then provides a preview of the main points that the body of the response will discuss: speed, convenience, and low costs, and how these have changed people’s view of the world
(B) Writing the Body of the Response
The body of the paragraph makes up most of the response It is in the body of the response that the writer develops the thesis statement (That’s why these para- graphs are sometimes called the development paragraphs.) In the body, the writer provides information to convince the reader that his or her opinion is correct or that his or her ideas are valid
A typical body paragraph begins with a topic sentence that contains the main idea of that paragraph (just as the thesis statement contains the main idea of the response) It also contains several sentences that support this main idea The writer should provide specific details, reasons, examples, and/or personal experiences to support these sentences
Topic sentence Supporting sentence Detail/reason/example/personal experience Detail/reason/example/personal experience Supporting sentence
Detail/reason/example/personal experience Detail/reason/example/ personal experience Remember that the supporting sentences and the details must be directly relevant
to the main idea of the paragraph; do not include irrelevant material
Look at these sample paragraphs from the body of responses written in response to the prompts provided on pages 682-683
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Samples
Body 1
The idea that zoos are cruel to animals is somewhat understandable People
like to think of wild animals in their natural habitats, living free in the way
they have done for thousands or millions of years They think of zoos as pris-
ons for animals They think that displaying animals in cages for the benefit
of visitors takes away from the animals’ dignity and confines them in small,
uncomfortable spaces In part, however, these people’s belief is based on a
misconception It’s true that in the past, animals in zoos generally lived in
cramped, dirty cages Newer zoos, however, try to duplicate animals’ natu-
ral habitats as much as possible and give animals a comfortable amount of
space Even many older zoos are upgrading their facilities for their animals
There are a number of reasons why | think that zoos’ functions are
mainly positive One reason is that zoos protect not only species of animals
but also individual animals Many species are endangered because of human
development or other environmental problems As mentioned, some species
only exist in captivity Zoos around the world have cooperative breeding
programs to increase the number of endangered animals In the future, it
may be possible to re-introduce these species into the wild Furthermore,
some animals’ native habitats have become dangerous for them, not just
because of predators but because of humans Tigers, for example, are often
killed because parts of their bodies are used in very expensive “medicines.”
In zoos, at least these animals are protected
Another reason to support zoos is that they provide an educational
experience How many of us would be able to see elephants from Africa,
penguins from Antarctica, or koala bears from Australia if we did not see
them in a zoo? Moreover, zoos provide information about which animals are
endangered and tell us why these animals are in trouble
In the first body paragraph, the writer “admits the opposition,” giving reasons
why the opinion that zoos are harmful places could be valid The writer says that
some people prefer to think of wild animals as living only in wild settings These
people find zoos undignified, and they think that animals are forced to live in
small, uncomfortable cages The writer here points out that this view of zoos is
outmoded because new‘zoos and even some older zoos now provide more space
and try to duplicate animals’ natural habitats
In the second body paragraph, the writer then gives her own reasons for
supporting zoos The writer says that zoos protect both endangered species and
endangered individuals
In the third paragraph, the writer explains an additional reason for supporting
zoos She says that zoos serve an educational function They allow people to see
animals from faraway places and learn about endangered species
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Body 2 When | was an undergraduate student, most of the large classes | took were introductory classes for first- and second-year students For example, | took classes in world history and economics that had over 100 students and met
in large lecture halls | think these classes were as good as some of the
smaller classes | took later At the introductory level, the lectures that the
professors gave were basically the same no matter what size the class was Moreover, the professors who taught these classes seemed more enthusiastic and energetic than the teachers | had in smaller classes Personally, | think they enjoyed having a large audience!
One supposed advantage of small classes is that there is usually a lot more interaction among students and between the teacher and the students
than in large ones However, in the large classes | took, discussion sessions
were held every week with a graduate teaching assistant in which there was
a lot of interaction Besides, the teachers for these classes had office hours,
and they were always willing to answer questions and talk over problems The writer uses personal experiences with large and small classes in both paragraphs to support the thesis statement In the first paragraph, he says that in introductory classes the teachers’ lectures were basically the same no matter how many students there were In fact, in his experience, teachers were more dynamic
in larger classes
The second paragraph says that people think there is more interaction in small classes than in large ones, but that, in fact, the writer found that there was a lot of interaction in the weekly discussion sessions held in conjunction with the large classes He also says that the teachers held office hours in which to answer
questions
Body 3 The most obviously important characteristic of jet travel is the high speed involved A hundred years ago, it.took weeks to cross the Atlantic or Pacific oceans by ship However, today, those same trips can be completed in a matter of hours One can attend a meeting in Paris and have dinner in New York on the same day These amazing speeds have changed people’s con- cepts of space Today the world is much smaller than it was in the past
Convenience is another reason why international jet travel is so impor- tant In the past, if someone wanted to travel between Europe and North America, he or she might have to wait days or even weeks before a ship sailed Furthermore, there were only a few ports in Europe where one could board a large ship, and almost all of them went only to New York City
Today, however, there are probably several hundred flights a day connecting the two continents and one can board international flights in the airport of almost every large European city and fly to any large city in the United States or Canada
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Another important aspect of jet travel is its relatively low cost An inter-
national journey one hundred years ago was extremely expensive Only
wealthy people could afford to travel comfortably, in first class Poor people
had to save for years to purchase a ticket, and the conditions in which they
traveled were often miserable Today, it is possible for more and more peo-
ple in every country to travel in comfort Thus, it is possible for business
people to do business all over the world, for students to attend universities
in other countries, and for tourists to take vacations anywhere in the world
In its topic sentence, the first paragraph gives the first reason why jet transport is
an important development: its speed The writer compares the speed of jets with
that of ships one hundred years ago, gives an example of the speed of jets (attend-
ing a meeting in Paris, having dinner in New York on the same day), and shows the
effect of this speed on the way people view the world
In the second paragraph, the writer mentions the convenience of travel by jet,
explaining how passengers can fly on almost any day and leave from and arrive at
any large city In the past, ships left only every few weeks and from only a few ports
The third paragraph begins by stating another important aspect of jet travel: its
relatively low cost The writer again compares travel today with travel in the past
and shows how more and more people travel comfortably He gives examples of
specific types of people who have been affected by the affordability of jet travel:
business people, students, and tourists
(C) Writing the Conclusion
Like the introduction, the conclusion for a response can be fairly short and simple
It does not have to be more than a few sentences in length The conclusion should
give the reader the feeling of completion, not a feeling that the writer has simply
run out of ideas or out of time
Here are some of the functions a conclusion can serve:
To present the thesis statement (if this is not presented in the introduction)
To restate the thesis statement (if this is given in the introduction)
To summarize the main points presented in the body
To show the significance of the points made in the body
vvvvy To present one last compelling reason why the writer's opinion is the
correct one
Look at these samples of concluding paragraphs:
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Conclusion 1 All in all, | agree with the concept that zoos are desirable institutions
Opposition to zoos, | think, is mainly based on outmoded ideas of zoos
Today’s zoos protect animals and educate people about animals and the environmental dangers they face
This conclusion begins with the thesis statement for the response—that the writer agrees with those that support zoos The writer also summarizes key points from the body: that opposition to zoos is based on ideas about zoos that are no longer valid, and that modern zoos protect animals and provide educational experiences for visitors
Conclusion 2
In conclusion, | don’t think that the size of a class is very important | think that learning depends more on the quality of the teaching than on the number of students in the class
This is a very simple conclusion that restates the thesis statement from the intro- duction and summarizes the main point of the body paragraphs
Conclusion 3
To summarize, the speed, the convenience, and the low cost of international
jet travel have changed the world Individual nations are not as isolated as they were in the past, and people now think of the whole planet as they once thought of their own hometowns
This conclusion summarizes points made in the body paragraphs and shows the significance of these points