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Trang 137Sample Writing answers
TEST 4, WRITING TASK 2
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 4.0 score
The Mvanteg of Drivelef> Vehidef>
firnt of all number of vehidef> if> inc.are-fie da'i after da'i which meanf> ever da'i the world getf> more drivern then before lf we admite- that alotf> of people pre-for to Uf>e public tranf>port we do not have, an'i doubtf> that man'i people Uf>t the vehidef> buauf>e of advantagf> of driving
The hif>to� f>howf> Uf> that the human like to move from place to another for man'i reaf>nf> and the alwa'if> foll pleaf>ed when the rid Thif> da'if> people have all kind of vehidef> bickf>, cam, motor etc buauf>e the'i all have a different advantage
people needf> alf>o can not meet at be found in one pie-ace, for that reaf>on people need to move
from a ple,c,e, to another place, to meet thier needf> which meanf> the advantage of moving from point
to anther point will be eiif>t for ever
World haf> bee changed a lot and man'i people have got great jobf> with big f>alarief> The, can e-af>l'ifund thier vehid and becauf>e people get foe-ling boring if the Uf>td to Mme thing the-'i alwa'if> pere-for to chang thier vehicle from time to time
finall'i I think it if> ve� hard to believe that the driverltf>f> vehidef> with outweigh the dif>advantage-f>
becauf>e people alwa'if> find drive more and more give thier lifo meaning and add more, advantage
to it all kind of vehidef> give happentf>f> to a lot of people that the'i can not think about lof>f>ing it Here is the examiner's comment:
138
Most of the ideas in this response are not relevant to the question It mainly talks about the need people have to go from place to place and how people like different types of transport However, there is a position expressed in the final paragraph
A title is not required in Task 2
There is some attempt to organise the ideas and there are some basic cohesive devices [First of all I Finally], but there is inaccuracy and a general lack of
coherence There is no clear progression
There is a high density of error in the use of vocabulary in terms of spelling and word choice [eas/y fund thier vehicl I perefer to chang thier] Sentence structures
are very limited, although there are some attempts at subordinate clauses [because they all have a different advantage]
Trang 138Link audio: https://drive.google.com/file/ d/1Alhh8wQ8vNLK3c1V9FWe4ZxGh4DZl GHy/view?usp=sharing