Wives and Daughters ELIZABETH GASKELL CHAPTER 19-P2 pot

Her mind became weak and confused.' 'She had only sons, I think?' 'No; only Mr Osborne and Mr Roger Hamley.. Cynthia spoke first, - 'I wish I could love people as you do, Molly!' 'Don't

Wives and Daughters

ELIZABETH GASKELL

CHAPTER 19-P2

Mr Gibson had come in very late, and was having a solitary dinner in the

dining- room Molly was sitting near him to keep him company Cynthia and her mother were upstairs The latter was trying on a head-dress which Cynthia had made for her

Molly remained downstairs after her father had gone out afresh on his final round among his town patients The fire was growing very low, and the lights were waning Cynthia came softly in, and taking Molly's listless hand, that hung down by her side, sate at her feet on the rug, chafing her chilly fingers without speaking The tender action thawed the tears that had been gathering heavily at Molly's heart, and they came dropping down her cheeks

'You loved her dearly, did you not, Molly?'

'Yes,' sobbed Molly; and then there was a silence

'Had you known her long?'

'No, not a year But I had seen a great deal of her I was almost like a daughter

to her; she said so Yet I never bid her good-by, or anything Her mind became weak and confused.'

'She had only sons, I think?'

'No; only Mr Osborne and Mr Roger Hamley She had a daughter once -

"Fanny." Sometimes, in her illness, she used to call me "Fanny."'

The two girls were silent for some time, both gazing into the fire Cynthia spoke first, -

'I wish I could love people as you do, Molly!'

'Don't you?' said the other, in surprise

'No A good number of people love me, I believe, or at least they think they do; but I never seem to care much for any one I do believe I love you, little Molly, whom I have only known for ten days, better than any one.'

'Not than your mother?' said Molly, in grave astonishment

'Yes, than my mother!' replied Cynthia, half-smiling 'It's very shocking, I

daresay; but it is so Now, don't go and condemn me I don't think love for one's mother quite comes by nature; and remember how much I have been separated from mine! I loved my father, if you will,' she continued, with the force of truth

in her tone, and then she stopped; 'but he died when I was quite a little thing, and no one believes that I remember him I heard mamma say to a caller, not a fortnight after his funeral, "Oh, no, Cynthia is too young; she has quite forgotten him" - and I bit my lips, to keep from crying out, "Papa! papa! have I?" But it's

of no use Well, then mamma had to go out as a governess; she couldn't help it, poor thing! but she didn't much care for parting with me I was a trouble, I daresay So I was sent to school at four years old; first one school, and then another; and in the holidays, mamma went to stay at grand houses, and I was generally left with the schoolmistresses Once I went to the Towers; and

mamma lectured me continually, and yet I was very naughty, I believe And so I never went again; and I was very glad of it, for it was a horrid place.'

'That it was,' said Molly, who remembered her own day of tribulation there

'And once I went to London, to stay with my uncle Kirkpatrick He is a lawyer, and getting on now; but then he was poor enough, and had six or seven children

It was wintertime, and we were all shut up in a small house in Doughty Street.' But, after all, that wasn't so bad.'

'But then you lived with your mother when she began school at Ashcombe Mr Preston told me that, when I stayed that day at the Manor-house.'

'What did he tell you?' asked Cynthia, almost fiercely

'Nothing but that Oh, yes! He praised your beauty, and wanted me to tell you what he had said.'

'I should have hated you if you had,' said Cynthia

'Of course I never thought of doing such a thing,' replied Molly 'I didn't like him; and Lady Harriet spoke of him the next day, as if he wasn't a person to be liked.'

Cynthia was quite silent At length she said, -

'I wish I was good!'

'So do I,' said Molly, simply She was thinking again of Mrs Hamley, -

Only the actions of the just

Smell sweet and blossom in the dust

- and 'goodness' just then seemed to her to be the only enduring thing in the world

'Nonsense, Molly! You are good At least, if you're not good, what am I?

There's a rule-of-three sum for you to do! But it's no use talking; I am not good, and I never shall be now Perhaps I might be a heroine still, but I shall never be

a good woman, I know.'

'Do you think it easier to be a heroine?'

'Yes, as far as one knows of heroines from history I'm capable of a great jerk,

an effort, and then a relaxation - but steady every-day goodness is beyond me I must be a moral kangaroo!'

Molly could not follow Cynthia's ideas; she could not distract herself from the thoughts of the sorrowing group at the Hall

'How I should like to see them all! and yet one can do nothing at such a time! Papa says the funeral is to be on Tuesday, and that, after that, Roger Hamley is

to go back to Cambridge It will seem as if nothing had happened! I wonder how the squire and Mr Osborne Hamley will get on together.'

'He's the eldest son, is he not? Why shouldn't he and his father get on well together?'

'Oh! I don't know That is to say, I do know, but I think I ought not to tell.'

'Don't be so pedantically truthful, Molly Besides, your manner shows when you speak truth and when you speak falsehood, without troubling yourself to use words I knew exactly what your "I don't know" meant I never consider myself bound to be truthful, so I beg we may be on equal terms.'

Cynthia might well say she did not consider herself bound to be truthful; she literally said what came uppermost, without caring very much whether it was accurate or not But there was no ill-nature, and, in a general way, no attempt at procuring any advantage for herself in all her deviations; and there was often such a latent sense of fun in them that Molly could not help being amused with them in fact, though she condemned them in theory Cynthia's playfulness of manner glossed such failings over with a kind of charm; and yet, at times, she

was so soft and sympathetic that Molly could not resist her, even when she affirmed the most startling things The little account she made of her own

beauty pleased Mr Gibson extremely; and her pretty deference to him won his heart She was restless too, till she had attacked Molly's dress, after she had remodelled her mother's

'Now for you, sweet one,' said she as she began upon one of Molly's gowns 'I've been working as connoisseur until now Now I begin as amateur.'

She brought down her pretty artificial flowers, plucked out of her own best bonnet to put into Molly's, saying they would suit her complexion, and that a knot of ribbons would do well enough for her All the time she worked, she sang; she had a sweet voice in singing, as well as in speaking, and used to run

up and down her gay French chansons without any difficulty; so flexible in the art was she Yet she did not seem to care for music She rarely touched the piano, on which Molly practised with daily conscientiousness Cynthia was always willing to answer questions about her previous life, though, after the first, she rarely alluded to it of herself; but she was a most sympathetic listener

to all Molly's innocent confidences of joys and sorrows; sympathizing even to the extent of wondering how she could endure Mr Gibson's second marriage, and why she did not take some active steps of rebellion

In spite of all this agreeable and pungent variety of companionship at home, Molly yearned after the Hamleys If there had been a woman in that family she would probably have received many little notes, and heard of numerous details which were now lost to her, or summed up in condensed accounts of her father's visits at the Hall, which, since his dear patient was dead, were only occasional

'Yes! The squire is a good deal changed; but he's better than he was There's an unspoken estrangement between him and Osborne; one can see it in the silence and constraint of their manners; but outwardly they are friendly - civil at any rate The squire will always respect Osborne as his heir, and the future

representative of the family Osborne doesn't look well; he says he wants

change I think he's weary of the domestic tete-a-tete, or domestic dissension But he feels his mother's death acutely It's a wonder that he and his father are not drawn together by their common loss Roger's away at Cambridge too - examination for the mathematical tripos Altogether the aspect of both people and place is changed; it is but natural!'

Such is perhaps the summing-up of the news of the Hamleys, as contained in many bulletins They always ended in some kind message to Molly

Mrs Gibson generally said, as a comment upon her husband's account of

Osborne's melancholy, -

'My dear! why don't you ask him to dinner here? A little quiet dinner, you know Cook is quite up to it; and we would all of us wear blacks and lilacs;' he couldn't consider that as gaiety.'

Mr Gibson took no more notice of these suggestions than by shaking his head

He had grown accustomed to his wife by this time, and regarded silence on his own part as a great preservative against long inconsequential arguments But every time that Mrs Gibson was struck by Cynthia's beauty, she thought it more and more advisable that Mr Osborne Hamley should be cheered up by a quiet little dinner-party As yet no one but the ladies of Hollingford and Mr Ashton, the vicar - that hopeless and impracticable old bachelor - had seen Cynthia; and what was the good of having a lovely daughter, if there were none but old women to admire her?

Cynthia herself appeared extremely indifferent upon the subject, and took very little notice of her mother's constant talk about the gaieties that were possible, and the gaieties that were impossible, in Hollingford She exerted herself just as much to charm the two Miss Brownings as she would have done to delight Osborne Hamley, or any other young heir That is to say, she used no exertion, but simply followed her own nature, which was to attract every one of those she was thrown amongst The exertion seemed rather to be to refrain from doing so,

and to protest, as she so often did, by slight words and expressive looks against her mother's words and humours - alike against her folly and her caresses Molly was almost sorry for Mrs Gibson, who seemed so unable to gain

influence over her child One day Cynthia read Molly's thought

'I am not good, and I told you so Somehow I cannot forgive her for her neglect

of me as a child, when I would have clung to her Besides, I hardly ever heard from her when I was at school And I know she put a stop to my coming over to her wedding I saw the letter she wrote to Madame Lefevre A child should be brought up with its parents, if it is to think them infallible when it grows up.'

'But though it may know that there must be faults,' replied Molly, 'it ought to cover them over and try to forget their existence.'

'It ought But don't you see I have grown up outside the pale of duty and

"oughts." Love me as r am, sweet one, for I shall never be better.'