Luận văn article why did china set up an oil rig within vietnamese waters why now and why vietnam by four various translators

‘Therefore, it is necessary to control the quality of the translations before publication so that the readers can enjoy lic best edition, This desis is an altompl to assess Wie quality

'VIETNAM NATIONAL UNIVERSITY, HANOL

UNIVERSITY OF LANGUAGES AND INTERNATLONAL STUDIES

FACULTY OF POST - GRADUATE STUDIES

FORAGE

NGUYEN TIIU ILANG

TRANSLATION QUALITY EVALUATION OF ANKIT PANDA’S:

ARTICLE “WHY DID CILNA SET UP AN GIL RIG WITILIN VIETNAMESE WATERS? WHY NOW AND WIY VIETNAM?”

BY FOUR VARIOUS TRANSLATORS

(Đánh giá chất lượng cic ban dich bai bio “Why Did China Set Up

an Oil Rig Within Vietnamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?”

của Ankit Panda béi bon dich giả khác nhau)

M.A MINOR PROGRAMME TIIESIS

Field: English Linguistics

Code: 60220201

HANOI - 2016

'VIETNAM NATIONAL UNIVERSITY, HANOL

UNIVERSITY OF LANGUAGES AND INTERNATLONAL STUDIES

FACULTY OF POST - GRADUATE STUDIES

FORAGE

NGUYEN THU HANG

TRANSLATION QUALITY EVALUATION OF ANKIT PANDA’S

ARTICLE “WHY DID CHINA SET UP AN GIL RIG

WITHIN VIETNAMESE WATERS? WHY NOW AND WHY VIETNAM?”

BY FOUR VARIOUS TRANSLATORS

(anh gia chất lượng các ban dich bai bao “Why Did China Set Up

an Oil Rig Within Vietnamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?”

của Ankit Panda bởi bốn dịch giả khác nhau)

M.A MINOR PROGRAMME THESIS

Field: English Linguistics Code: 60220201

Supervisor: Assoc Prof Dr L@ Hing |

HANOI - 2016

‘A special word of thanks goes to all the teachers of the Faculty of Post - Graduate Studies at University of Languages and Intemational Studies, Vietnam National University, Hanoi for their useful lectures, assistance and cnthusiasm during my couse, Without their support and encouragement, it would never have been possible for me to have this thesis accomplished

Last but not least, I am greatly indebted to my family, especially my parents,

my husband and my younger brother for the sacrifice they have devoted to the fulfillment of this academic work

ABSTRACT

There is a fact that in the current era of information explosion, daily contents published on the Internet have neglected strict censorship in advance in terms of quantity and quality It can be seon that many English - Vietnamese translations cannot ensure enough precise information or convey emotion and intentions of the author in the souree language text approprialely Even some of them have arodified

on purpose by adding individual opinions or comments of the translators ‘Therefore,

it is necessary to control the quality of the translations before publication so that the readers can enjoy lic best edition, This desis is an altompl to assess Wie quality of four different versions of for an online Knglish article on Y'he Diplomat basing, on the schema of Translation Quality Assessment proposed by Newmark By this way, the writer has found that the translations have obtained a certain success However,

it still reveals some mismatches between the source text and the target text, especially in terms of reflecting the intention of the author accurately In addition, some other mistakes in Lorms of word choice and strucure ammangemonl which may affect the conciseness of the translations are also pointed out From the basis of the

finding some implications are made along with suggestions for further studies

ii

1.3 Summary 22 CHAPTER 2: APPLICATION OF NEWMARK’S MODEL FOR TRANSLATION QUALITY ASSESSMENT

2.1 Step 1: A brief analysis of the SL text stressing ils intention and its

2.2 Step 2: The translator’s interpretation of the SL text's purpase, his

translation method and the translation’s likely readership

2.3 Step 3: A selective but representative detailed comparison of the

translation with the original

2.3.1 Word choice & expression

2.4 Step 4: An evaluation of the translation

2.4.1 An evaluation of the translation in the translator’s terms

2.4.2 An evaluation of the translation in the critic’s term

2.4.3 Assess the translation as a piece of writing, independently of its

3.5 Step 5: An assessment of the likely place of the translation in the

target language culture or discipline

LIST OF ABBREVIATIONS

ST: Source Text

TT: Target Test

SL: Source Language

TI Target Language

V1: Version 1 (the first version)

V2: Version 2 (the second version)

V3 „ Version 3 (the third version)

V4; Version 4 (the fourth version)

TQA: Translation Quality Assessment

P; Paragraph

S: Sentence

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LIST OF TABLES AND DIAGRAMS

Comparing, versions in terms of words and expression

Comparing versions in Lerms of denolalive meanings

Comparing versions in terms of separation and combination Comparing versions in terms of word arder

Comparing versions in terms of complex sentences and

A: INTRODUCTION

1 Rationale of the study

In human history, cultural exchange commenced along with the emergence

of culture Translation, a cultural phenomenon and a means of cultural exchange,

has brought a community beyond its spatial and temporal dimensions as contended

by Kelly (2004): “Without translation, there is no history of the world.” Without

translation, our world would encompass secluded oases, which would develop

separaloly and their own histories withoul contributing to the world history Tn fact,

translation not only brings new knowledge horizons for humanity, but translation

activities can also promote exchange of civilization and culture among the people

and the nations worldwide Therefore, it can be said thal since its beginning days,

translation has played a very important role for years

Tn Vielnam, aller 1945, translation industry bas developed and had great

contribution to economic, cultural, and social development of our country As a result, the demand for translation is increasingly diversified, An enormous number

of books and documents need to be translated The mass media such as radios, televisions, newspapers are also required to transfer information from foreign

languages into Vietnamese to convey to the public The contracts, project

documents, data in need of translation in the administrative transactions, trade, and

international cooperation also surged ‘The foreign movies should have captions or subtitles in Vietnamese In addition, training sessions of professional interpreters

are also being conducted al many uriversilies in Vietnam to tram a large Leam of

people working in the translation ficld

Generally, neither translation ner interpretation im cur country has not

become a professional job Sharing the same point, Ms Tén Nit Thi Nmh, former

Deputy Chairman of Foreign Relations Committee of Vietnam’s National Assembly

said in the event "Intemational Conference on Translation and Language”

(Translalor Day) held on December 13, 2013, “Translation m Vietnam has nol

really been developed inte a profession with high professionalism because of the

lack of formal standards, then, the discipline in this work is not high and it is

dilTicult to distinguish the level of translation.”

It is a fact that this has led to bad even serious consequences Sadly,

Vietnam has been listed one of countries with the worst quality of translated

versions Thy Phong, the aulhor of the article “Bao giờ mới hết những chữ vô hỗn”

on the viemamnet expressed his own opinions about “translation disasters”

According to him, besides rather successfully-translated masterpieces such as

“Wuthering Heights” (2d: gid Ini), “Harry Porter”, “The Centaur in the Garden”

(Con nhân mã & trong vuén), some classic works such as “Lolita” translated by

Dương Tường, “The Da Vinoi Code” (Mật mã Da Vinej by Đỗ Thụ Hà and some

other textbooks have been called “translation disasters” with dozens of mistakes These works have received a lot of negative criticism and opinions from the public

and on mass media This has become great concern for critics, translators, and Linguistics,

However, unfortunately, until now, we have had no works specialized in

theory and method of banslation between English and Vietnamese in our country, but only focusing on the study of translation practice wlule foreign countries have

many relevant works between linglish and other languages by such famous authors

as Nida, Newmark, Campbell, Baker, Bell, Hatim and Mason These projects have contributed greatly in the development of theory as well practice of the translation and promoted the quality of translated versions more efficiently and professionally

Translation is indeed a challenging job In order to produce a high-quality

translation, translators are required to have both talem and flexibility in every circumstance In addition, they alse have to hone their skills regularly, their love for

translation, as well as abundant knowledge of culture, society, human beings and

even equivalent languages Sometimes, because of lacking certain understanding or translators’ carelessness, translated versions may not be concise and clear enough ven more seriously, (hey can transfer messages which writers or authors want lo

try to convey to readers in a wrong way Such errors will haye bad cffect on the public for long time, especially the information on the mass media such televisions and newspapers Therefore, the usage of vocabulary on the mass media ins generat and translation in particular requires both high quality and professionalism

An M.A theses review at universities in Viemam shows that many

assessment works related (o literature, and some specialized terms, including law,

economy, health care, and culture have been conducted hese are preliminary studies on applying a new theory of translation evaluation and criticism into the

assessment of translated versions from English into Vielnamese with remarkable

results in terms of theory and practice Llowever, the number of political versions is still limited, especially sensitive political issues

Since information technology developed fast, the right of frec press has

been promoted Correspondents, journalists, writers have had a big playground on

the Imemet, especially online newspaper pages or websites Every day, they can

easily provide the latest information for readers without considering contents or

vocabularies strictly before publishing them, In addition, some bad elements also

took advantage of the Internet te distort and communicate false mformation to the readers, This can be reflected clearly through contents in tabloid newpapers

Remarkably, so far, many stories, talks, interviews and articles have kept discussing

a hol topic - oil ng HYSY-981 on the mass media, especially on some famous

newspapers and magazines Among them, “The Diplomat”, a premier international current-affairs magazine for the Asia-Pacific region is known by many scholars and

readers Since 2002, “The Diplomat” has been dedicated to quality analysis and

commentary on events occurring in Asia and around the world So, news on this press is very abundant and comprehensive Many Vietnamese translators have used

this uselul source (o explore formation and Ly to transfer equivalent meanings of

articles Llowever, it is regretful that many of them are incorrect and incomplete

versions with grammar and vocabulary mistakes, even with wrong messages ta the

readers This made meaningful articles become ditficult for cveryone tơ understand

and in one way have negative impacts on the readers as well

From [he above-mentioned reasons, the author decided to find out # Lypieal

article with various translated versions, and then finally chose the topic

“Translation quality evaluation of Ankit Panda's article “Why Did China Set Up an Oil Rig Within Viemamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” by four various

translators” for her thesis

2 Aims of the study

Tn this research, an allempt will be made to review the qualily of English-

Vietnamese versions in terms of conveying the intention of the author, and then

recommend some criteria for better translation of political articles

3 Scope of the study

The chosen English article “Why Did China Set Up an Oil Rig Within

Vietnamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” by Ankit Panda on “The

Diplomat” consists of nine paragraphs 1m total

In the limitation of a thesis, the author only selects some representative

examples to analyze the intention of the anthor expressed in the onginal in translations with a clear study framework - Newmark’s TQA model

Vour respective translated versions are also selected including:

¥ 1" version: “Vi sao Trung Quốc thiết lập giàn khoan trong vùng biển Vit

Nam? Vi sao la hic này và vì sao Việt Nom?” by Dam Ha Khánh on

http:/nghiencuulichsu.com;

v 24 version: “Tai sao Trung Quéc dua giàn khoan vào vùng biến Việt Nam?

Tai sao lại vào lúc này, và tại sao lại là liệt Nam?” by Vũ Lhị Phương Anh on

titp:/tasang cam.vn,

v 3'Íveniom: “Tại sao Trung Quốc đặt giàn khoan vào vùng biển Việt Nam? Tại sao lại vào thời điểm này và tại sao lai la Vidt Nam?” by C.K on

hfp//inmoi.vn,

vs 4 yœsion: “gi sao Trung Quốc lại triển khai giàn khoan trong vùng biễn Việt Nam? Tại sao diễn ra vào thời điểm này và tại sao mục tiêu lại là Việt

Nam?” by Văn Cường ơn hltp/nphieneuubiendong vn

These sources are available on the Internet and main websites to share

information as well as propaganda on islands and waters of Vietnam

4 Significance of the study

- Theoretical aspect: ‘his research helps readers have a general overview of translation theory meanwhile they can know how to apply TQA model by Newmark

in evaluating translated versions

- Practical aspect: Factually, this study is somehow useful for translators and translation critics in translating materials from English into Vietnamese in general,

whereas iL also gives some lips for them to handle problems arising during

translation process, especially issues related to sensitive political contents

Moreover, it is also hoped that the results of this study will contribute to assessing

the translation of press works based on a specific model

5 Researeh methodology

4.1 Research questions

In the research, the author focuses on 2 following research questions:

= Question 1: ‘lo what extent do the translations convey the intention of the author?

= Question 2 Whal are the recommendations for the translalion of political

articles?

5.2 Research approach

During evaluation process, Contrastive Analysis approach will be applied to

compare and assess translated versions against the original one

3.3 Research method

Firsily, the original text will be read thoroughly and comprehensively based

on Newmark’s reading procedures After that, the source text will be compared to

its respective translations

5.4 Data analysis

‘The author evaluates the Vietnamese translated versions based on the 5-step

model of Pelor Newmark

> Step 1: A brief analysis of the SL text stressing its intention and its

functional aspects

> Step 2: The wanslator’s mnerpretation of the ST text’s purpose, his

translation method and the translation’s likely readership

} Step 3: A selective but representative detailed comparison of the

translation with the origival

} Step 4: An evaluation of the translation: (a) in the wanslator’s terms, (b) in the critic’s terms, (c) assess the translation as a piece of writing,

independently of ils original

} Step 5: Where appropriate, an assessment of the likely place of the

translation in the target language culture or discipline

6 Design of the thesis

Ihe thesis is divided into 3 main parts

~ Part A: Introduction (This part provides readers an overview of the thesis including the ratienale for the study, the aims, the scope, the

methodology, and the organization of the study)

¥ Part B: Development (This part consists of 2 chapters) Chapter 1: Literature review

This part discusses the theoretical background knowledge related to

translation including definition, translation methods, translation procedures, translation equivalence, translation assessment, and contastive analysis ‘/hen the

author reviews previous related studies, explains clearly the reason why she has

decided to cheose TQA of Peler Newmark and coutrastive anal: approach 1o

assess versions

Chapter 2: Application of Newmark's model for T'QA

This is the main part of the study In this chapter, the author applies comparison and analysis between original texts and translation versions, and discusses aboul five-slep TQA model by Newarark mentioned above Lo assess Vietnamese versions

Y Part LU: Conclusion This part will summarive the main ideas and findings of the study Then,

some conclusion will be drawn.

PART B: DEVELOPMENT CIIAPTER 1: LITERATURE REVIEW

1.1 Translation theory

1.1.1 Translation definition

“Since human beings speak different tongues, translation exists." (Sieiner, 1975: 51) The activity of translation has a long-standing tradition and has been

widely developed throughout the history In our rapidly changing world with

widening cultural exchanges, its role has become of paramount importanec Undoubtedly, the twentieth cemury has been called “the age of translation”

(Jumpelt, 1961)

However, it is not easy to find out a general definition of the translation Until now, about 200 various concepts can be mentioned ‘hey are different angles,

from the general to the more specialized Tn the Imit of this thesis, (he author only

mentions some key opinions to help readers have some general overview about the

real nature of translation and related knowledge

Originally, translation comes from “translation” or “traduce” in Latin,

meaning “to carry across” or “to fead across” ‘Translation is like the bridge to give instruotions and connect In fact, it is a process of transformation of terms and

meanings from one language into another language, from the original language, the

source language to the target language So, it can be understood that translation is

encryption of meaning and form of the target language through deciphering the

meaning and form of the source language

As Hatim and Munday (2004) pointed out 1 a similar definition, translation

can be analyzed from two different perspectives: that of a ‘process’, which refers to

the activily of turning a ST inlo a TT in another language, and that of a ‘product’,

Le a translated text

Calford described it in these terms: “Translation is the replacement of

textual material in one language (SL) by equivalent textual material in other

language (TL).” (Catford, 1965:20) Apparently, he was much concemed about maintaining a kind of “equivalence” between the ST and the I'l

Sharing the same point, Harman & Stock (1972) considered translation to be the replacement of a representation of a text in one language by a representation of another equivalent in a second language

One of the rather detailed definitions with the mosL remarkableriess was

proposed by Peter Newmark (1988: 7) Ln his opinion, translation is “a craff” that

attempts to replace a message in a written form by the “same” message in another

message

Shuttleworth and Cowie (1997) see that translation 1s a very broad notion

which opens the way to be understoad in various ways This broad notion enables

one lo talk about translation as process and a product Tn addilion, one cant recognize

sub-types of translations such as literary translation, technical translation, subtitling

and machine translation

Clearly, no maller how diverse these definitions can be, they alt share the same feature which emphasizes the importance of finding the closet equivalence in

meaning by the choice of appropnate target language’s lexical and grammatical

structures, communication situation, and cultural context,

1.1.2 Translation methods & procedures

According to 1 Hing Tiến (2006), lo be successful in evaluating the

translation quality, the critic must have the knowledge of basic matters of translation theory such as the nature, procedures, methods and equivalence of

translation In arder to translate a text from a SL into a TL, the translator must use some certain methods and procedures, sometimes a combination of them While translation methods relate to the whole text, translation procedures are used for

sentences and the smaller units of language

1.1.2.1 Translation methods

The eight different translation methods suggested by Newmark can be shown through the following diagram

SL cmph: ‘TL emphasis

Literal translation Free translation

Faithful translation Idiomatic translation

N

Semantic translation Communicative translation

Diagram 1: Translation methods

(Newmark, 1988: 45)

From the diagram, i1is clear thal the relationship of each method with the ST

and the I'L is different ‘fhe position of each method (higher to lower in comparison

with the SL or the TL) reflects not only the distance with the SL and the TL but also the features of the translation product created by a respective method: whether it is

more alike to the SL or the I'L (Lé Hung ‘Ti

(006) Kor example, word-for-word translation method creates the product characterizing the most features of the SL

and adaplation give birth to a banslation version which is the most alike 1o the TT

liach method can be explained briefly, as follows:

= Word-for-word translation: The SL word-order is preserved and words

translated smgly by their most common moaning, oul of context

= Literal translation: The SL grammatical constructions are converted to their

nearest TL equivalents but the lexical words are translated singly, out of context

" Faithful translation: Tt aliempts to reproduce the precise contextual meaning of the original within the constraints of the ‘I'L grammatical structures

= Semantic translation: Tl takes more account of the aesthetic value of the ST

text than faithful translation, compromising on ‘meaning’ where appropriate so

10

that assonance, word-lay or repetition jars m the finished version Therefore, it is more flexible, allows for the translator's intuitive empathy with the original

* Adaptation: The themes, characters, plots are preserved, and the ST culture

is converted to the TL culture and the text is rewritten

= Free translation: It is usually a paraphrase much longer than the original, a

so-called ‘Tntrakingual translation’, offen prolix and prelontious, and not

translation at all

= Idiomatic translation: It reproduces the ‘message’ of the original but tends

lo distort nuances of meaning by preferring colloquialisms and idioms where

these do not exist in the original

= Communicative translation: It attempts to render the exact contextual

meaning of the original im such a way thal both conloril and language are readily

acceptable and comprehensible to the readership

(Newmark, 1988: 43)

Among these methods, Newmark pul emphasis on only two methods,

semantic and communicative translation In his opinion, they are appropriate to any text Semantic translation focuses on primanly upon the semantic coment of the source text, wliercas communicative translation focuses ¢ssentially upon the

comprehension and response of the receptors

Some translation researchers and theorists say thal, how Newmark classifies translation methods is too complicated and theoretical and not practical However, others support Newmark’s own translation methods In fact, application of

translation methods is required to be flexible Translators can apply Newmark’s

translation methods and others creatively during translation process of texts in general and terms in particular effectively

1.1.2.2 Translation procedures

1n terms of translation procedures, there still exist some controversial about

what name to call this category Some authors use the term “procedure” while some

olhers prefer (he term “lechniques” or “strategies” Whalever it 1s called, we can

I

understand them as methods applied by translators when they formulate equivalenee for the purpose of transferring elements of meaning from SI to the I'l

Tn [his thesis, the author would like to usc the torm “procedure” suggested by

Newmark in 1988 In fact, different authors have different classifications of translation procedures [lowever, in fact, the terms used in their classifications

somelimes overlap Therefore, here the writer just wants to mention 14 Iranslation

procedures proposed by Newmark in his book “1 textbook of translation” (1995) They include:

= Transference: Tl is the process of transferring a ST word to a TI text It includes transliteration and it 1s somewhere called "transcription."

= Naturalization: It adapts the SL ward first to the normal pronunciation, then

to the uonmal morphology of the TT

= Cultural equivalent: It means replacing a cultural word in the SL with a TL

one however, "they are not accurate"

* Functional equivalent: Tt requires the use of a culturo-neutral word

= Descriptive equivalent: In this procedure the meaning of the SLT is

explained in several words

= Componential analysis: It means "comparing an SL word with a TL word

which has a similar meaning but is not an obvious one-to-one equivalent, by

demonstrating first heir common and then their differing sense components.”

= Synonymy: It is a "near I'L equivalent." Here economy trumps accuracy

= Through-translation: It is the literal translation of common collocations,

names of organizations and components of compounds It can also be called

calque or Joan translation

= Shifts or transpositions: It involves a change in the grammar from SL to

TT., for instance, (i) change from singular to plural, Gi) the change required

when a specific SL structure does not exist in the IL, (iii) change of an SL verb toa TL word, change of an SL noun group to a TL noun and so forth

12

* Modulation: It occurs when the translator reproduces the message of the

original text in the ‘I'L text in conformity with the current norms of the TL, since

the ST and the TI may appoar dissimilar in terms ol perspective

= Recognized translation: It occuws when the translator "normally uses the

official or the generally accepted translation of any institutional term."

= Campensation: Tl occurs whon loss of meaning in one parl of a sentence is compensated in another part

= Paraphrase: In this procedure the meaning of the CBT is explained Ilere

the explanation is much more delailed than that of descriptive equivalent

= Couplets: lt occurs when the translator combines two different procedures

(Newmark, 1995)

Tn general, the translation procedures are useful to the translator As can be seen, in this olassification, each procedure is distinguished quite clearly from each

other However, in the real situation of translating a text, the translator may apply

them flexibly by combining two, three or four procedures (conplets, triplets, quachuplets) to deal with a single problem

1.1.3 Translation equivalence

LLL, Definition

Translation equivalence is the fundamental concept of translation theory and also the main criterion in assessing the qualily of a translation A Wanslalion is generally said to be ‘good’ if it can maintain a certain degree of equivalence to the

ST Nevertheless, the concept remains controversial and opinions vary radically as

to its exact meaning

Basically, ‘equivalence’ is a term used by many writers to desoribe the nature

and the extent of the relationships which exist between SL and TL texts

(Shutuleworth & Cowie, 1997: 49)

readership of the original” ” He also secs the equivalence cffect as the desirable result rather than the aim of any translation except for two cases: (a) If the purpose

of the STL text is to allect and the TT translation is to mlorm or vice versa, (b) TT

there is a pronounced cultural gap between the SL and the TL text

Baker has another way to define this term by pointing out three levels of

translation cquivalence basing on the linguisLic forms, thal is, equivalence at word

level, sentence level and text level ‘'o be more concrete, she explores the notion of non-equivalence at different levels and in relation to the translation process, including ston-equivalence al word level, non-equivalence above word level, grammatical equivalence, textual equivalence and pragmatic equivalence,

‘As can be seen, translation equivalence is still a complex and controversial

comoupt, In order to have bellor understanding of this term, if is ne

ary Lo have a look at how translation equivalence is classified into different types

1.1.3.2 Types of translation equivalence

Similar 1 the case of the nohon of “gunslalion equivalence”, until now, there are various ways to classify translation equivalence based on different factors

Tn “Fy thuyét và thực tiễn dịch thuật Anh-Viét: MGt sd vấn đề vẻ lý luận và phương

pháp cơ bản”, four conuaon ways of classifying translation equivalence can be identified, as follows:

* Form-based equivalence: equivalence al word, sentence, or text level

" Meaning-based equivalence: denotative, connotative, pragmatic, formal equivalence

= Function-based equivalence: dynamic equivalence, formal equivalence

= Quantitative equivalence: one-to-one equivalence, one-to-many equivalence,

one-to-part-of-one equivalence, nil equivalence

Basing on a quanlilalive approach (quantily-based), Munday (2001) suggesls

five types of translation equivalence: One-to-one equivalence, one-to-many

equivalence, many-to-one equivalence, one-to-part-of-one equivalence, nil

14

equivalenoe From this categorization, it is noticeable that Munday mamly focused

on the quantity of equivalence rather than meaning equivalence

Baker (1992) who is im favor of Corm-based equivalence classifies Irmslation equivalence into equivalence at the word level (number, gender, tense} and above word level and textual equivalence (equivalence between a SL text and a TL text in lerms of information and cohesion)

On the contrary, Nida (1964), who supports function-based equivalence, distinguishes formal equivalence and dynamic translation as basic orientations According to him, formal equivalence is achieved when the ST and TL werds have the closest possible match of form and content and dynamic equivalence is achieved when the SL and TL words have the same effect on their effective readers In his opinion, a ienslalion is successful if it can achieve an cquivalent response in the two languages, which means dynamic equivalence is the goal of translation To be

‘good’, a translation must meet these four basic requirements:

V mnaking sơnse

Y conveying the spirit and manner of the original

¥ having a natural and easy form of expression

v producing a similar response

© Lach author has his own reasons for classifying different types of translation cquivalenve However, with respect to three basic [avtors in translating: the nature of the message, the purpose of the author and the translator and the type of audience, the kind of equivalence by Koller (1979) can

be considered a satisfactory approach He classified equivalence in translation

into five categories as follows

= Denotative equivalence: the SL and the TL words refer to the same thing in

the real world

= Connotative equivalence: In addition to denotative value, source and target

language words should also produce the same communicative values in the mind of native speakers of the Lwo languages

15

= Text-normative equivalence: The SL and the TL words are used in the

same or similar context in their respective languages

© Pragmatic equivalence: Wilh readership orientation, the SI and TI words

have the same effect on their respective readers

= Formal equivalence: In this type of equivalence, source and target language

have the same formal aesthetic features, orlhograpbic or phonological fealures

For Newmark, despite sharing similar ideas of translation equivalence with

Nida, he uses ‘semantic translation’ and ‘communicative translation’ for “formal equivalence’ and ‘dynamme equivalence’ respectively Communicative translation

aims at producing “the same effect (or one as close as possible) on the readership of the translation as was obtained on the readership of the original”, Semantic

translation, on the other hand, allempls to render the exael contextual meaning of

the original

In brief, this classification can be used as basic criteria to assess the

equivalence of the translated version in comparison with the original As mentioned

above, translation equivalence is a very important and difficult aspect ‘Iranslation

means Lo find equivalence between lwo languages The translator has to find and choose appropriate TL equivalents to SL words

1.1.4 Translation assessment

LIAL, Definition

In fact, this term has many other alternative names such as “!ranslation

quality assessment” as in the study of Malcolm Williams (2009), or “Translation criticism” in the book “A texthook of translation” by Newmark (1995) or

“Translation evaluation” by Julianne House

According to [latim and Mason, “The assessment of iranslator performance

is an achivily which, despite heing widespread, is under-researched and under

discussed” (llatim and Mason 1997:199, cited in Williams, 2001) From this

definition, it can be seen that Hatim and Mason have not given a conerete definition

of “tanslalion assessment” bul mamly emphasize the fact of ass

sing translation

16

text at that time and the necessity of paying mere attention to assess the translation

text seriously and more critically

Newmark (1995) also gives his own definition However, similar to Hatim and Mason, his focus is not really on what tanslation assessment actually is but

rather on the importance of translation evaluation as followed: "Translation

crilicivm is an essential link between translation theory and ix practice."

(Newmark, 1995: 184)

Among famous researchers, Malcolm William’s definition can be said to be much clearer He defines the tenn “Translation Qualily Assessment” (TQA) in several aspects Just like evaluation in the broad sense, I'QA can

be quantitative or qualitative it can be based on mathematical/statistical measurement (as im the casc of most academic insinuments) or on readers’ responses, interviews and questionnaires (e.g Nida) TQA can

be diagnostic (determining areas for improvement at the beginning of a course of

study), formative (measuring progress and giving [eedback during a course of

study) or summative (measuring the results of learning) It can be seen that in

Williams’s view, TQA canmol and should nol be valuss-free: 10 be useful, if must be based on criteria of goodness, Otherwise, all we do is describe detects and strong

points in translations: “Whether our focus is on products, performance or

competence, we are essentially frying (o determine degrees of goodness when we

perform 1QA The approach can be prescriptive, assessing translation against

criteria of aesthetic effect, usability, and intrinsic compliance with standards of terget language correctness and fidelity.”

1.1.42 Translation Quality Assessment Models

There are different Translation Quality Assessment (TQA) models Hach of

them introduces new ideas and ways to

ess (he qualily of a translated work

The concept “Models of 1QA” is not new because it has been initiated by

many authors such as Wilss, Kaller or Reiss However, according to Lé Hing Tiến

(2006), tie models suggested by Koller, Wilss and Reiss, in spite of being very

potontial, lack conoretc stcps to be applied in reality In fact, Peter Newmark and

Julianne Llouse are two outstanding researchers who create their own models to

repair these shortcomings of the previous authors Therefore, we will have deeper insight into their models

= Julian House and her model

Julian House is a Gorman linguist She fist proposed her model for

translation quality assessment in 1977 in “A Model for Translation Quality

Assessment” The original madel attracted many criticisms which are said to have

been tackled in her revised model in 1997 — “Translation Quality Assessment: 4

Model Revisited”

As written in House's report an Meta (2001: 247), the assessment model is

“based on Hallidayan systemic-functional theory, but also draws eclectically on Prague school ideas, speech act theory, pragmatics, discourse analysts and corpus-

based distinctions between spoken and written language” After being revised,

House’s model still aims al providing for “the analysis and comparison of an original and its translation on three different levels: the levels of Language/lext,

Register (Field, Mode and Tenor}, and Genre” (House, 2001: 247), or for the discovery of ‘mismatches’ between the TT and the ST om the same tiree levels She

also gives a clearer scheme for analyzing and comparing original and translated lexis, as follows

18

Individual textual function

Meld Tenor Mode

Subject Participant relationship + medium

matter and (simple/complex)

‘al acti + aulhor’s provenance and

(simple/complex) + social role relationship

Diagram 2; A Scheme for Analyzing and Comparing

Original and Translation Texts

According to Lé Ling

én (2006), Llouse’s model has a clear linguistically theoretical base and concrete, delailed sleps However, this model also requires linguistic knowledge and high occupational skills of the critics and the criticism mainly aims at researching languages and translation Therefore, this model has not

19

been applied widely and just at experimental level in translation studies In addition, Llouse’s model seems to be a promising one to assess literary translation

Therefore, we will have a look al another model of TQA by Peter Newmark

= Peter Newmark und his model

In 1998, in “A textbook of translation”, Newmark gives his own model of

TQA called “comprehensive crilicism ol'a translation” including five obvious steps

> Step 1: A brief analysis of the SL text stressing its intention and its functional aspects

> Step 2: The translator’s mlerpretation of the ST text’s purpose, his

translation method and the translation’s likely readership

} Step 3: A selective but representative detailed comparison of the

translation with the original

® Step 4: An evaluation of the translation: (a) in the translator's terms, (b) in the critic’s terms, (c) assess the translation as a piece of writing,

independent of us original

} Step 5: Where appropriate, an assessment of the likely place of the

translation in the targel language culture or discipline

These steps are initiated from the practical experiences of the translators It

can be seen that they are specific and easy to follow, especially Step 1 and Step 2

wilh maint focus on analyzing the ST text This is the first slage of Iranslation and

the basis of the useful discipline of translation criticism ‘Chrough these steps, the

translators will understand what the article is about and determine the intention of the SL text

Moreover, press translation requires high accuracy in terms of information and ideas The translated articles must provide enough information, respect the truth

and convey the message of the author to the readers accurately Hence, iL is necessary to evaluate the translation based on a conerete model in order to make the

assessment fairer and more objective

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For such reasons, the writer decides to apply Newmark’s medel in quality

assessment of the translated versions in this thesis

1.1.5 Contrastive Analysis

It can be said that it is necessary to find out similarities and differences

between the source and target texts in the evaluation of the quality of a translation

version Therefore, il is also essential lo understamd contrastive analysis According

to Carl James, “Cit is a linguistic enterprise aimed at producing inverted (ie

contrastive, not comparative) nvo-valued typologies (a CA is always concerned with

a pair of languages), and founded on the assumption that languages can be

compared” (James, 1980; 3), In short, contrastive analysis is the systematic study of

a pair of languages to identify their similarities and differences It is also rather

useful in studying problems in translation and language lypes

1,2 Previous studies

Until now, in Vietnam, several MA theses have discussed on translation

asseasmenl and equivalence Among them, some typical works can be listed, as

follows:

¥ A Sindy on the Stylistic Fquivalence between “The Qld Man and the Sea” by Hemingway and Its Translated Versions in Vietnamese by Van Thi Thanh Binh (2000);

¥ A Study on the Translation of Idiomatic Expressions in some TV Dramas by

'Tôn Thiện Quynh Irâm (2001);

¥ A Study on Textual Equivalence between some Australian Short Stories and

their Viewamese Translations by Nguyén Thị Tuyết Hồng (2006)

¥ Application old House’s Model for tanslation Quality Assessment in Assessing the English Version of The Vietnam Law on Investment by Luong

Té Lan (2007),

~ A Study on the Liquivalence Between Linglish and Vietnamese in LS Llealth

Insurance Plans by Vũ Thi Thanh Yén (2007),

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*ˆ Evaluating the translation of the Guidebook “Du lich Ha Long” Based on J

Llouse’s Approach by Nguyen Thủy Yên (2007);

vA Translation Quality Assessment of the Vietnamese Version of Part 7

“Nightmare” in the Novel “Twilight” Using J Hơuse's model by Lê Mỹ Hạnh (2010);

¥ An evaluation of the Vietnamese translated version ol’ “The call of the wild”

by Nguyễn Cung Ái and Vũ Tuần Phương by Nguyễn Thị Thu Hién (2012),

¥ A translation quality assessment of the Vietnamese version of the book

“Hany Porter and the philosopher’s stone” in the series Harry Porter using

Newmark’s model by Lloang ‘Thi [ling Nga (2014)

These are initial studies on application of new theories in assessment and

orilicism of translation as well as quality evaluation of Fryglish - Vicinamese works

with remarkably successful results in terms of theory and practice They are diverse

in both styles and contents based on different models by House and Newmark

However, il is a fact thal translation works related to polilic issues are not

popular, In addition, theses on TQA models tend to primarily concentrate on literary

field, regardless of non-literary one Hence, in the scope of the minor M.A thesis,

the researcher intends to focus on analyzing the wntention ef the author expressed in

the original Then, some criteria to translate political articles can be withdrawn

Clearly, translation studies in gencral as well vs translation evaluation and

criticism in particular are being paid more attention Heng, it is also required to

have more systematic and serious researches in various areas

1.3 Summary

Jn conclusion, wanslation is an activity that is growing phenomenally in today’s globalized world The study of translation has developed enormously in the

past years, In Chapter TT of this thesis, hy reviewing general background knowledge

of translation and related content, the author wants to help the readers to have some

understanding about the nature of translation as well as main concepts

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ARer imtrodueing some diferent TẠA models and mentioning basic features

of Llouse’s and Newmark’s models, the author comes to a conclusion that she chooses Newmark’s model to apply in her thesis, On one hand, this model 1s a combination of different authors, from Savory, Nida, Wills, Koller, Reiss to House Tow Newmark carries out is similar to the way which a translator often does during

a translation process On the other hand, House's model sceins to be more suitable for assessing literary works

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CHAPTER 2: APPLICATION OF NEW MARK’S MODEL

FOR TRANSLATION QUALITY ASSESSMENT

1n this chapter, the data collected from the Hnglish article (the SL text) and four corresponding Vietnamese translations (the TI texts) will be analyzed

practically based on the five-slep Newmark’s TQA model whoch the author suggested in the previous chapter to assess the quality of the ‘I'L texts ‘hen, the

intention of the author expressed in the original will be made clearer This study is

mainly a library research, combined with contrastive comparison in terms of the

quality

2.1 Step 1: A brief analysis of the ST text stressing ils intention and its

functional aspects

In early May, 2014, China set up a drilling rig named Haiyang Shiyou-981,

owned by the China Nauional Olfshore Oil Corporauon (CNOOC) in dispuled waters near the Paracel Islands in the South China Sea to start oil exploration According to the plan armounced by the Hainan Maritime Safety Administration of Chuna, this drilling work would last from May 2 to August 15, 2014

Soon after this act, Vietnam resolutely protested the move as an infringement

of its sovercignly be

use this rig was loaled on ils continental shell Tn a statement by Vietnam’s Foreign Ministry, an official said, “All foreign activities in Vietnam's seas without Viemam's permission are illegal and invalid.” Locally, Vivinam actively propagated and explained ils stance as well as updated on the latest issues so that international counties and friends could understand aggression and unruly of China in the exclusive economic zone of Vietnam In addition, communities in the world also objected fiercely against the bchaviow of China on the South China Sea, A number of nations like the US, Japan, the Philippines, Indonesia, and India condemned the action regardless of international law, causing instability and inercased tensions in the Beijimg arca Thousands of articles called

China’s behaviow “unacceptable”

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Among them, The Diplomat, with many talented pen names, had many articles related to this issue ‘This is a premier international current-affairs magazine

for the Asia-Pacilie region, launched in 2002 to dedicate to quality analysts and

commentary on events occurring in Asia and around the world It reaches an influential audience of commentators, policymakers, and academics with its in-

depth (reatment of regional issues

Ankit Panda is an Associate ditor of The Diplomat with expertise in international relations, political economy, intemational security, and crisis

diplomacy His analysis and reports have been widely cited and reprinted by many

famous joumals, including the Wall Street Journal, the sinancial Times, the Washmgion Post Reuters blogs, Foreign Policy, Newsweek His articles have

becn translated into various Tanguages such us Chinese, Japanese, Korean,

Vietnamese, Urdu, Thai, and Russian

On this occasion, he also wrote an article on The Diplomat - “Why did China

sel up an oil rig within Viemamese waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” His work

combined ideas raised by famous professors such as Carl Thayer and M Taylor

Fravel His purpose aimed al showing a general statement aboul this issue based on actual actions and explaining reasons why China set up an oil ng within Victnamese

waters Lle did not tend to give biased opinions for parties The article was written

wilh neutrally political genre of newspaper articles Tis readers can be

commentators, researchers, policymakers, and almost academics all over the world who are interested in issues in the Asia-Pacific region generally and relationship

between China and Vietnam particularly

2.2 Slep 2: The translator's interpretation af the SL text’s purpase, his

likely readership

translation method and the translation

Nonmally, the first aim of news is lo report factual events Tls phrases show

that the writer is concealing his propaganda purpose behind words and sentences

Hence, the translator has to be faithful to the author and not to his own view of pom so thal the banstation has the same emotional and persuasive charges, and

25

affects the readers in the same way as the original In fact, translation of press articles requires skills of a translator as well as a journalistic talent ‘The translators

of the journalistic texts must deal with muluple choices of iranslalion strategies Besides, the news is not very complicated because it was written for readers of different backgrounds As a result, fee translation is often used as a translation method for this type

The above mentioned article was written by Ankit Panda and was translated into many different languages In terms of Vietnamese, it has been studied and explored by many websites on the Internet, especially popular pages categorized in the South China Sea which are being taken care of by many readers from the young

to the old in many areas and regions inside and outside the country

The English arlicle “Why did China set up an oil rig within Vietnamese

seas? Why now and why Viemam?” consists of one headline and nine paragraphs

Comparing the translated versions with the original, it is easy ta recognize that most

of the writer’s ideas are transferred into the second language comprehensively and

successfully The language used in the translated versions complies with the

original one closely The translalors tried to keep mam coments of the ST text to convey the message of the author te the readers accurately and smoothly

Llowever, in some translations, the translators have misinterpreted the author

by adding or culling cerlain seclions of the ST intentionally Tt can be inferred thal

in some situations, sentences and ideas of the SIT can become understandable

through such addition or omission These details are not so important that the

readers can still understand the whole message On the contrary, in some cases,

addition or omission will transfer non-equivalent contents, even wrong information

to the readers

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2.3 Step 3: A selective but representative detailed comparison of the translation with the original

Tn this sigp, ina scope of this thesis, only some lypical examples are chosen for contrastive comparison between the SL text and four different ‘IL texts based on two classified specific criteria, More details can be seen in Appendix C

2.3.1 Ward choice & expression

It was found that proper names were used in every type of news because they were generally known by most people In other words, these names were significant ingredients of news

In terms of proper names, it can be seen that almost of the proper names in the origin were translated similarly in English versions, for example, HD-981 oil rig

- gian khoan (đầu) IID-981; PLAN - tau hải quan; the Communist Party of Vietnam - Đảng Cộng sản Việt Nam; tha Communist Tarty of Chỉna - Đảng Cổng

sân Trung Quốc; the South China Sca - Bién Déng; the Paracel Islands - qudin dao

Hoang Sa; the exclusive economic zone (ELZ) - ving dae quvén kinh 18

However, in some cases, Ihe banslators used different interpretations for the

same name such as CNOOC - Công íy dấu khí viễn dương quốc gia Trung Quốc In

V1, Céng ty China National Offshore Oil Company in V2, Tang Cong ty Hải

Dương Trung Quốc im V3, and Céng ty Dau khi Xa be Quie gia Trung Quée m V4

or ASEAN Heads of Government/State - lanh dgo ASEAN in V1, nhing người đứng đâu Chính phủ/Nhà nước của các nước ASEAN in V2, BS trwéng các Chính phit ASEAN in V3, and cde nguyén thi qude gia ASEAN in V4

In addition, the translator's choice of words is another section that needs to

be compared between the ST and the TT There is a fact that in many cases, the choice of words and expression can make a deep impression on the readers, whereas

in other cases, the readers find it not easy to understand

In order to convey exact messages from the ST to the readers, the wanslators tried to choose appropriate words and expression lo show ideas in the original

Table 1 demonstrates several typical cxamples of such translation Although

the words were translated in different ways, they still show a fact and an act Other similar illustralions can be referred in Appendix C

4 |Chinese coast tàubãovệ tau bio vé Tau tàu hải cảnh

ships/vessels ‘Trung, ‘Trung Quéc

Quêo

6 | respond with déptra dap A bang | dip lai bing kiểm chế

rhetoric and bằnglời — lờinóivà các phương | trong phén

restraint - not néivagitt bằng sự kiểm | pháp ngoại ứng và lời

Furthermore, in many situations, the words and phrases in the ST are far different with the TT in terms of denotative meaning, ‘They can be illustrated in the

followinys evidences:

1 | rl Jol ng lay ñwc|V4 thực hiện hành dộng “cướp bóc” ngay

Vietnamese waters trong vùng biển của Việt Nam

2 | 1-3 | China’s imteral |VI những quyết định nội bộ của Trưng

‘Trung Quéc

3 | T-1 | As Carl Thayer points | V3 ‘Tac gid din y kiến của các chuyên gia

out on this blog and M trên New York Times Tayler Fravel said im øn | V4 đã viết trên blog của mình interview with The New

York Times

4 | Iir4 | suddenly risk a relatively [V2 đột ngột đánh đổi một mỗi quan hệ

slable bilateral song phương tương dối én dinh relationship V3 đột nhiên phá tan mối quan hệ song

phương binh én

Wa bat nga gay bat ổn quan hệ song

phương,

5 | H4 | an uaderlying rvalry V4 hành động mang tỉnh dối dầu

6 | V-1 vessels |only Chinese coast guard | V1 tiu bảo vệ bờ biên Trung Quốc chi rammed

Vietnamese ships and hil them with water cannons

đâm vảo tàu Việt Nam va bin ho bing

với rằng

V2 Tring Quoc chi cho tau bao ve bir

biển dam vao tau Viét Nam va tân

công bing vai réng

29

không chỉ các tàu hành cảnh Trùng

Quốc dâm và tân công bing voi réng

vao cac tau Việt Nam

7 | V-l [PLAN remained in a | V2 quần đội chỉ giữ chúc năng hỗ trợ

support function V3 các tàu quân sự của Trung Quốc còn

sẵn sảng yêm trợ

8 |VII |Whereas vith the|V3 Trái ngược với Phipphies Hàn Quốc

Philippines, South và Nhật Bản, Mỹ bị ràng buộc bởi các

Korea, and Japan, the hiệp ước quốc tế để can thiệp vào các United States is treaty- trường hợp tranh chấp khác ở biển

bound to take action, in Dông

the case of other disputes

in the South China Sea

9 | VIL-4 | the “internationalization” | V1 “quốc tế hỏa” các tranh chấp trong

of disputes that China khi cho rằng môi nguy từ hành động,

dreads has nol ycl come gủa Trung Quốc vẫn chưa quá giới

to pass han

10 | IX-1 | the Bast China Sea V3 bién Déng

11 | TX-3 | what ultimately sets this | V1 rét cuéc diéu khác biệt đuy nhất trong episode apart from any

other

khủng hoâng lần này

* Arranging the structure of the article and paragraphs

It can be found that one difference between the original and the translated versions is about the format Commonly, the translators can transfer messages and ideas of the writer while rewriting the article in their own languages Sometimes,

30

the translators make their own choices to stat a new paragraph, which is different from the original format

Basically, four Inmslations reproduced essential delails in the message of the

author to the readers However, in some cases, the translators rearranged the article structure intentionally This can be seen clearly in the second and third translations

Specifically, in V2, the author omitted the sixth paragraph and separated the (irsL

paragraph into two smaller parts For V3, some more sentences which are private

opinions were added to serve for his own political intention

Tn addition, as can be seen in the following examples, in some translations,

original sentences were combined into one sentence or separated into two sentences

This phenomenon has little effect on sentence meanings and aims at making sentences more understandable and clearer

1 VII-3: However, as the ASEAN Summit

statement demonstrates, China still has an

that regional insufficiently united to put forth a joint

front against Chinese coercion in the

South China Sea

VII-4: WhnilE W is sigmficam thai ASBAN

Yoreign Ministers issued a separate

statement, the “internationalization” of

disputes thal, China dreads has not yet

come to pass (and likely will not anytime

soon

V2: Tuy nhiên, như các phát Diệu tại lội nghị thượng dinh ASEAN

cho thay, mac di các Bộ trưởng,

Ngoại giao ASEAN cũng đã đưa

Ta một tuyên bỏ riêng vả điều nay

là có ý nghĩa, nhưng việc "quốc

tế hỏa" các tranh chấp ở Điển

Đông mà Trung Quốc lo sợ vẫn

chưa xây ra (và ral cd thé sé

không xây ra sớm)

ie} Viel: Whereas with the Philippines, South

Korea, and Japan, the Uniled States is

treaty-bound to take action, in the case of

other dispules in the South Clana Sea, V3: Trải ngược với Philippines,

Hàn Quốc và Nhật Bản, Mỹ bị

rảng buộc bởi các hiệp ước quốc

tế để can luệp vào các trường

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