Finalassignment language awareness translation is the expression in another language of what has been expressed in another, source language, preserving semantic and stylistic equivalences

The way text analysis focused on the vocabulary, the text liking means,the articles, the sentence types, the tenses and the style is important for the translatornot only to understand an

Huế, tháng 12 năm 2022

TABLE OF CONTENTS

I INTRODUCTION

1 Definition of Translation

“Translation is the expression in another language of what has been expressed inanother, source language, preserving semantic and stylistic equivalences” (Bell,2011) On the other hand, Hatim and Mason (1990) consider translation as “acommunicative process which takes place within a social context” In spite of thedifferences in expression, share common features that they all emphasize theimportance of finding the closest equivalence in meaning by the choice of appropriatetarget language’s lexical, grammatical structures, communication situations andcultural context

2 The importance of Text Analysis

“Text analysis is considered with the study of written and spoken texts as languageelements strung together in relationships with one another that can be defined It is thestudy of the formal linguistic devices that distinguish a text from random sentences”(Truong, B.L & Truong, T N T, 2012)

Due to linguistic, stylistic and cultural differences, the translation might lose a certaindegree of meaning relating to the original text Therefore, the translation should beanalyzed comprehensively to ensure that the whole text is fully and correctlyunderstood The way text analysis focused on the vocabulary, the text liking means,the articles, the sentence types, the tenses and the style is important for the translatornot only to understand and get a clear overview of the source language (SL) text aswell as the target language (TL) text but also makes sure that the translation isacceptable by the readers in the TL

II TEXT ANALYSIS

1 English to Vietnamese

ENGLISH VERSION

(1) Roaring noon (2) In a well-fanned forty-second street cellar I met Gatsby forlunch (3) Blinking away the brightness of the street outside, my eyes picked him outobscurely in the afternoon, talking to another man

(4) “Mr Carraway, this is my friend Mr Wolfshiem.” (5) A small, flat-nosed Jewraised his large head and regarded me with two fine growths of a hair whichluxuriated in either nostril (6) After a moment I discovered his tiny eyes in the half-darkness

(7) “ So I took one look at him” said Mr Wolfshiem, shaking my hand earnestly,

“what do you think I did”

(8) What? I inquired politely

(9) But evidently he was not addressing me, for he dropped my hand and coveredGatsby with his expressive nose

(10) I handed the money to Katspaugh and I said “All right, Katspaugh don’t pay him

a penny till he shuts his mouth” (11) He shut it then and there

(12) Gatsby took an arm of each of us and moved forward into the restaurant,whereupon Mr Wolfshiem swallowed a new sentence he was starting and lapsed into

a somnambulatory abstraction

(13) “Highballs” asked the head waiter

(14) “This is a nice restaurant here” said Mr Wolfshiem, looking at the Prebyteriannymphs on the ceiling (15) “But I like across the street better!”

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(16) “Yes, highballs” agreed Gatsby, and then to Mr Wolfshiem “it’s too hot overthere”

(17) “Hot and small—yes,” said Mr Wolfshiem, “but full of memories”

(18) “What place is that?” I asked

(19) “The old Metropole”

(20) “The old Metropole,” brooded Mr Wolfshiem gloomily (21) “Filled with facesdead and gone (22) Filled with friends gone now forever (23) I can’t forget so long

as I live the night they shot Rosy Rosenthal there (24) It was six of us at the table, theRosy had eat and drunk a lot all evening (25) When it was almost morning the waitercame up to him with a funny look and says somebody wants to speak to him outside

VIETNAMSES VERSION

(1) Trưa ồn ào náo nhiệt (2) Tại một tầng hầm nhiều quạt gió trên phố bốn mưa hai,tôi đến gặp Gatsby để ăn trưa (3) Chớp chớp mắt cho quen dần vì vừa ở ngoài sángbước vào, tôi lờ mờ nhận ra anh ở tiền sảnh, đang nói chuyện với một người đàn ôngkhác

- (4) Ông Carraway, xin giới thiệu đây là ông Wolfshiem, bạn tôi

(5) Một người Do Thái nhỏ thó, mũi tẹt, ngẩng cái đầu to lên nhìn tôi với hai túm lôngmũi thò ra quá dài (6) Một lúc sau, tôi phát hiện ra hai con mắt ti hí của ông ta trongánh sáng lờ mờ

(7) … thế là tôi nhìn hắn ta một cái, - ông Wolfshiem nói, hớn hở bắt tay tôi, và ôngthử nghĩ xem tôi làm gì?

- (8) Làm gì? Tôi hỏi, giọng lễ phép

- (9) Nhưng tất nhiên không phải ông ta nói với tôi, vì ông ta buông tay tôi ra và hếchcái mũi biểu cảm của mình về phía Gatsby

(10) Tôi trao tiền cho Katspaugh và bảo “Được rồi, Katspaugh này, đừng có mà trảcho hắn dù chỉ một xu chừng nào hắn ta chưa câm cái mồm” (11) Thế là hắn câmmồm ngay lập tức.

(12) Gatsby nắm lấy cánh tay mỗi người chúng tôi đẩy vào quán ăn, còn ôngWolfshiem nuốt ngược vào họng một câu nói khác vừa định thốt ra và thả mình vàomột trạng thái lơ đãng của kẻ mộng du

- (13) Whisky- soda ạ? Người quản lý hỏi

- (14) Quán này tốt đấy, - Wolfshiem, nói, mắt ngước nhìn các thánh nữ dòng Prebyte

vẽ trên trần- Nhưng tôi thích cái bên kia đường hơn

- (15) Ừ, cho Whisky- soda đi, -Gatsby tán thành, rồi quay lưng sang Wolfshiem - ởbên kia quá nóng

- (16) Nóng và nhỏ quá, đúng thế, nhưng đầy những kỷ niệm

(17) Tôi hỏi:

- (18) Nơi nào thế?

- (19) Quán Metropole cũ

(20) Wolfshiem vẻ u buồn, nói chậm rãi

(21) Quán Metropole cũ (22) Đầy những gương mặt đã chết và đi xa (23) Đầy nhữngbạn bè nay đã vĩnh viễn ra đi (24) Chừng nào tôi còn sống thì tôi chưa thể quên cáiđêm chúng tôi sáu người ngồi ăn và Rosy đã ăn uống rất nhiều suốt tối (25) Đến gầnsáng thì người hầu bàn đến chỗ cậu ấy với vẻ khó hiểu, bảo là có người muốn nóichuyện với cậu ấy ngoài cửa

1.1 Word count

While the total number of words in source language is 318, that of target language is

415 The length difference between two versions is 97 words, which means that it isnot a good translation in terms of translation length The translation is much longercompared to the SL text

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1.2 Vocabulary/ Word Meaning

Vocabulary plays an important role in making a good translation Some terms aresuccessfully translated into Vietnamese and some terms need some improvements tosound natural in Vietnamese

 Roaring (line 1) → ồn ào náo nhiệt

The word roaring is literally translated as the sound of loud noise For example, anoun phrase “a roaring thunder” is translated as “tiếng sét ầm ầm” In the translation,translator uses “ồn ào náo nhiệt” to make it natural and easy to understand forVietnamese The translator wants readers to understand the context of a very busycellar on a hot day In this context, “ồn ào náo nhiệt” is reasonable and the lexicalrelation used in this translation is near synonymy

 Lunch (line 2) → ăn trưa

In this translation, there is a shift of word class from a noun to a verb It is reasonable

as it sounds clear and original in Vietnamese If translator uses “cho bữa trưa”, it isnot clear and natural in Vietnamese

 My eyes picked him out obscurely (line 3) → tôi lờ mờ nhận ra anh ở tiền sảnh

“Pick” literally means “to choose somebody/something carefully from a group ofpeople or things” In this translation, “Pick him out” means “to recognize someoneamong other people” which makes Vietnamese readers easy to understand It is alsomore natural and familiar in Vietnamese instead of using the meaning of “nhặt” or

“chọn”

 Mr, Caraway, this is my friend Mr Wolfshiem (line 4) →Ông Caraway, xin giới

thiệu đây là ông Wolfshiem, bạn tôi

In this translation, the translator adds “xin giới thiệu” which is very suitable forVietnamese speaking style Vietnamese get used to speaking politely with the attitude

of respecting other people, especially the older ones It makes the translation naturaland original in Vietnam

 Drop my hand (line 9) → buông tay tôi ra

The word “drop” means “to fall or allow something to fall by accident” If thetranslation is “thả”, Vietnamese readers can understand the action in this situation.Nevertheless, “buông” makes the translation more natural It means that word choiceplays an important role in the success of a good translation

 …cover Gatsby with his expressive nose (line 9) → hếch cái mũi biểu cảm củamình về phía Gatsby

If this sentence is translated literally, it is “nhắm Gatsby với cái mũi biểu cảm củamình” However, Vietnamese readers cannot understand easily and clearly in the literal

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translation Therefore, the translator uses the word “hếch” which is expressive for thestory writing style

 Mr Wolfshiem swallowed a new sentence he was starting (line 12) → ôngWolfshiem nuốt ngược vào họng một câu nói khác vừa định thốt ra

“Swallowed” means “nuốt”, but the translator adds “ngược” that sounds very natural inVietnamese “nuốt ngược” is a good option in this translation

 Looking at the Prebyterian nymphs on the ceiling (line 14) → mắt ngước nhìn

các thánh nữ dòng Prebyte vẽ trên trần

If the translator translates “nhìn các thánh nữ”, it is okay to understand for Vietnamesereaders However, to make the translation expressive like story writing style, “ngướcmắt nhìn” is translated reasonably

 But I like across the street better (line 15) → Nhưng tôi thích cái bên kia đườnghơn

“Across” is an adverb meaning in a particular direction towards something – “ở bênkia”

Nevertheless, if the translation is “ở bên kia”, it is not clear and easy for Vietnamesereaders to comprehend Adding “cái” makes the translation clearer andstraightforward

 I can’t forget so long as I live the night (line 23) → Chừng nào tôi còn sống thìtôi chưa thể quên cái đêm…

“so long as” has the meaning of “miễn là” or “với điều kiện là” However, in thistranslation, “chừng nào” is much more natural and vivid

Nevertheless, it seems that the translator missed some phrases in the source text whentranslating into Vietnamese

“Small” is translated as “nhỏ thó” which is not common and familiar in Vietnamese

In this translation, “small” should be translated as “ nhỏ con”

… With a funny look…(25) Với một vẻ khó hiểu

“Khó hiểu” is not a good option in this translation as it is not common and natural inVietnamese It should be translated as “ là lạ”

1.3 Text linking means

1.3.1 Conjunctions

Conjunction refers to specific devices for linking one sentence to another There are

a number of words – conjunctions and adverbs – which fulfil this function

1.4 The Articles

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While articles (a/an/the) are always used in English to make the nouns behind themclearer, there is no similar concept in Vietnamese In Vietnamese, classifiers includingdeterminers, and numerals are used before nouns frequently instead of articles.Therefore, there are differences when the translator renders the meaning of someclassifiers in the original text.

…the street outside …vừa ở ngoài sáng bước vào

In this SL, there is an article “the” in front of the noun “street” and an adverb “outside”

to make the noun” street” clearer However, in Vietnamese version, there is notranslation for this article This translation is still clear and natural to understand

A small, flat-nosed Jew raised his large

head and regarded me…

Một người Do Thái mũi tẹt, ngẩng cái đầu

to lên nhìn tôi…

In this SL, there is an article” a” which is translated literally in Vietnamese “một”.Hence, it is easy for Vietnamese readers to understand

This is nice restaurant herea Quán này tốt đấy

The article “a” in the SL is omitted in the translation It is still explicit andunderstandable in Vietnamese

1.5 Sentence types/ Sentence structures

Sentence structures are very important in translation because they contribute to thecoherent as well as the understanding of the text Those examples below focus on thechanging sentence structures of the translator

the afternoon

tôi lờ mờ nhận ra anh ở tiền sảnh

In this translation, the translator changes the place of subject and object If it istranslated literally, the translation is “mắt tôi lờ mờ nhận ra anh ấy” The way thetranslator changes the order in this sentence makes the translation natural and original

in Vietnamese

with two fine growths of a hair which

luxuriated in either nostril

với hai túm lông mũi thò ra quá dài

In the source text, there is a relative clause which adds meaning for the noun behind.However, the translator omits relative pronoun in the translation as in Vietnamese it isstrange to hear such clause “…cái mà thò ra quá dài…”

don’t pay him a penny till he shuts his

mouth

đừng có mà trả cho hắn dù chỉ một xu

chừng nào hắn ta chưa câm cái mồm

If this sentence is translated literally, it is “đừng có mà trả cho hắn dù chỉ một xu chođến khi hắn ta câm cái mồm” Nevertheless, the translator uses adaptation strategy tomake the translation explicit and natural for Vietnamese to understand with thetranslation “…. chừng nào hắn ta chưa câm cái mồm”

I can’t forget so long as I live the night

they shot Rosy Rosenthal there

Chừng nào tôi còn sống thì tôi chưa thể quêncái đêm chúng bắn chết Rosy Rosenthal ở đóThere is a change of clause from the SL to the TL The translation is a good option tomake the genuineness and origin

1.6 Tenses

This extract is from a story which tells things that have happened already, so the maintense used is past tense However, in the Vietnamese TL text, there is no form changethat describes the past tense In spite of that, readers who know Vietnamese canunderstand clearly those things

For example:

I met Gatsby for lunch tôi đến gặp Gatsby

He was not addressing me không phải ông ta nói với tôi

So I took one look at him Thế là tôi nhìn hắn ta một cái

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In Vietnamese, according to Cao Xuan Hao, there is no concept of tense Accordingly, to express time relation, temporal adverbials or extra words calledtemporal markers such as “đã”, “đang”, “sẽ”, “sắp”, “từng”, “chưa”, “vừa”, “mới” areused with the function of indicating tense in some cases For example:

the Rosy had eat and drunk a lot all

evening

Rosy đã ăn uống rất nhiều suốt tối

Based on these examples, context is a great importance in showing time relation.When translating from English text into Vietnamese text, the translators shouldconsider carefully to make sure they can keep the meaning of the SL text

1.7 Style

It is a novel written in informal language, reflecting the ironic writing style of theauthor In the translation, translator succeeds in conveying the author’s intention It isclear that the characteristic of characters and scenes is maintained by the figurativelanguages, literary devices and vivid images The translation is considered to beattractive to the readers of the TL

To conclude, although there is a need for improvement, in general, the translator stillsucceeds in preserving the authenticity of the source text as well as conveying theauthor’s writing style to the readers without losing the accuracy, clarity andnaturalness of the translated version

1.8 Some micro strategies were used in translating

1.8.1 Direct transfer of an ST item into the TT

- Lunch = ăn trưa

- Drop my hand = buông tay tôi ra

1.8.2 Calque

- Roaring = ồn ào náo nhiệt

1.8.3 Direct equivalence of an ST item into the TT