Tiếng anh comparison about non verbal communication system of different cultures

MINISTRY OF EDUCATION AND TRAINING HANOI OPEN UNIVERSITY FACULTY OF ENGLISH ************ ASSIGNMENT ON INTERCULTURAL COMMUNICATION COMPARISON ABOUT NON – VERBAL COMMUNICATION SYSTEM OF DIFFERENT CULTU[.]

MINISTRY OF EDUCATION AND TRAINING

HANOI OPEN UNIVERSITY FACULTY OF ENGLISH

************

ASSIGNMENT ON INTERCULTURAL COMMUNICATION

COMPARISON ABOUT NON – VERBAL COMMUNICATION SYSTEM OF DIFFERENT CULTURES

( So sánh về sự khác nhau trong việc giao tiếp phi ngôn từ

giữa các nền văn hóa khác nhau )

Supervisor: Luu Chi Hai

Hanoi, 2017

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Contents 1

I Introduction 2

II Development 3

1 Theory Background 3

1.1 Definitions and the importance of raising a child 3

1.2 Growing stages of a child from the age of 1to 19 4

2 Analysis about raising a child in Vietnam and in America 5

2.1 In Vietnam 6

2.2 In America 7

2.3 Differences 8

2.4 Summary 9

III Conclusion 10

References 11

I Introduction

As we have known before, in every country, educating people is always one of the most important concerns with every single country in the world today, especially young children - "The Future Owner of This Blue and Green Planet" Raising a child

in families nowadays is now more and more concerned than ever, for this new world

is in need of new people to make it move From huge developed empires in the European Unions to the small developing countries in the South East Asia, every parents in every family are doing everything they can everyday so their next

generations can have a better future than them right now, whether their skin is black, yellow, or white

At this point, you may wonder "What is the connection between raising a child and

an assignment of intercultural assignment? “ Well, many centuries ago, our

ancestors have pointed out that the way you raise a child is also the reflection mirror

of your culture

From that point of view, the author of this research paper realized that because of the culture of each country is different, so the culture in raising a child of each country is also different I'm an English learner, and at the same time I have a thing

or two about raising a child On the other hand , I also want to show you what I know about raising a child in America, and differences in the way our country raise a child in comparison to the biggest country in the world right now

My only purpose in this research paper is to help people to understand the

differences between the way we are raising a child in Vietnam and the way people

do it in America, and from that point, we can learn something new from the youngest nation about raising a child Some parts in this research paper are only my opinions and other ideas from my friends and relatives, due to my lack of experience in this field, so I really want to have some advices on this one Hope you will enjoy it!

II Development 1.Theory Background

1.1 Definitions and the importance of raising a child

There are quite some definitions about raising a child But in general, raising a child

is generally believed as an activity in which happens in families with the main goal

to help the subject (Which is the child) to develop in all aspects as well as being fully developed like a normal human Family is also the first and the most important society in everyone’s life Characteristics, abilities, and habits, which are the

reflections of any culture is also reflected in a child from the age of six We usually say that family is the home that help us to grow and the crib that help us to put our first steps into the world The first school for everyone is the family and the first teachers of any child are their parents

About the importance of raising a child, it is written in The Catholic Education Statement that “The first and undeniable task, as well as the right of parents is to raise their children.” (GD6) Beside schools, a very important social impact, parents’ concerns are also counted as a measure for the development of a child As the life transmitters, parents have a heavy but honor duty to raise their children In other words, we can say that parents are the first and also the main teachers of every single child The matter of raising a child must be concerned and carefully executed

Confucius also once said “If you don’t raise your own children, then you would better off raise a pig for its meat”

1.2 Growing stages of a child from the age of 1 to 19

There are many growing stages of a normal person, but in this research paper we focus to the age of 1 to 19, which is also the main structure for comparing later From the age of 1 to 5: At this stage, children will start learning about the world around them They start “finding out” what they can do But they are still too small and lack of experience to “succeed”

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From the age of 6 to 12: Children are taking their first steps to walk alone in this society, starting with communications and competitions with their friends at school They also find out about their own strength and talents But on the other hand, they are less obedient

From the age of 13 to 19: Children in this stage are considered as “Wild Horses” Puberty, plus the will to control everything in life make a child from cute little babies to rebels They start learning about their value in life and their relationship with other people as well This is the most important stage for the development a child

Because in the US parents have a tradition to put their children into the dormitory when they get into the university, even if their house is near the university So to make it fair, I’ll only take it to age of 19

2 Analysis about raising a child in Vietnam and in America

2.1 In Vietnam

* From the age of 1 to 5:

This is the time when a child is truly new to the world His/ her grandparents, parents and other relatives are really happy because of the existence of a new born child The kid is loved by everyone around him / her From the age of 1 to 3, parents always speak simple words to their children like "mom" or "dad" and wait for the child to repeat after it A child is also raised up and sent to sleep with traditional lullaby songs that have gone out through centuries That is the first step of

acculturation, which is the process of teaching new generations of children the customs and values of the parents’ culture This is also the phase when the child will repeat after everything that his/ her mom and dad speak or do, so parents will take advance of this time to teach their children about rules and orders (or just simple like things that we can do and things that we are not allowed to do) If their child refuses

to follow, mom and dad will always be ready to give them a slap in the face, or just a whoop in the ass This quite brutality way is based on an idiom of our ancestors from

thousands of years ago which is still believed to be true in the present "If you hate your

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child, then give him a candy But if you love him, then give him a whoop" As a child in Vietnam, I believe that everyone have gone to this stage of life

Then, from the age of 3 to 5, children are sent to kindergartens or playgroups and the task to put a child in order is now mainly passed from parents to the teacher Parents send their children to the kindergarten in the morning, and pick them up in the afternoon, when working time is over

*From the age of 6 to 12

A child can have his/her own room from this period of life Before primary

education, parents will start finding the best primary school in town for their child They believe that the better the school is, the better their child will be Actually this situation happens when the child finishes any level of education, including primary, secondary and upper - secondary But after all, the phase from kindergarten to primary is always considered as the hardest battle of them all A couple of months before the first grade, children will be sent to classes to learn to write and read Parents believe that it will help their children to catch up with their friends and the lesson plans at school later

That is 3 months before the age of 6, and the next six years is just like this The child is dropped off at school from 8:00am to 4:00pm It's quite like kindergarten, but things get more "interesting" with extra classes after school Children are forced

to go to extra classes by their parents with the hope to help them to get good grades

at school It is believed that a child’s mark is equal to parenting level, the honor of the family and the superiority of the family’s gene Some talented children are even sent to special classes for talented ones to find out and raise up their potentials Arguments start coming up, but in parents' minds, they are still controllable Good marks at school are the only measurements for children So from that point they start comparing their children with his classmates at school They also find any moment

they can to ask the teacher how their children are doing at school to make sure that everything is going on their way The concept of “The child of the other family”

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(Or Con Nhà Người Ta in Vietnamese) which is very trending right now on social media Parents believe that if his/her classmates can do it well at school, so can their children On the other hand, they think it’s a useful tool to “encourage” their children

to learn better

*From the age of 13 to 19

Generation gap is mainly built in this time Beside extra classes and other things about studying, young adults now have to face up with puberty and the will to try everything new They want to do what they like, when they like it, with whom From that point of view, they usually have the different point of view to their parents ( or old people like we say nowadays) Arguments are not just about studying, they are now moving on to other things like passions, or even love Vietnam is really

traditional about love Mostly young people are not encouraged, even forbidden from love at this stage because their parents believe that it will affect the studying process

of their children But things get really messed up at the age of 18, when the child is preparing for the GCSE exam For parents, this is the most important exam in life The future of a child is believed to be laid on the line The mark from this test is usually believed to have power that can decide the fate of child, whether they will get in a university and become successful, or become a failure If a child pass this test, it will be the honor of the whole family Then, parents start guiding their

children to universities which are guaranteed for a steady job after graduation, or just

a university which guarantees a job that is just like the one they are doing Children start arguing with parents about the university they like and the one that their parents prefer Some talented children are sent to universities about art or music, but that is only a small number That is the end for the age of 19

2.2 In America

*From the age of 1 to 5

A newborn child in America is welcomed to this world just like the way we do it in Vietnam Quite like Vietnam, from the age of 3 children are also sent to

kindergartens or

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playgroups, but parents will prefer places with a playground and near parents’ offices (If possible) When they have a short break time during work, they can pass

by the playground and see what their children are doing It is not uncommon at this time for a child to be put in a separate room, which is seen as the first step for a child

to have his/her own independence Parents also spend the evening at home to talk or play with their children to get to know their children better, proving themselves not just friends, but also a reliable advisor for their own children Then at night, to get their children to sleep, parents will prefer to read fairy tales to give their children a good night That is why more than three quarters on four of fairy tales that we read nowadays come from this land

*From the age of 6 to 12

Choosing a school for a child is really easy here for parents Even though they send their children to a state school (Which is funded by the government and free of charge) or a private school (Which is funded by private sectors with high study fees), the values that their children can have are just the same At this stage,

children are taught to make decisions and be responsible for their own actions At the age of 9 or 10 a child can have the right to deliver newspapers, milk or even letters if possible in the neighborhood to get some earnings and contribute to the society Children can even join groups of boy scouts or girl scouts to sell cookies or volunteer in social activities as well Even though these jobs are not highly paid, but they will help the children to save some money for further study in the future

On the other hand, they will also know how hard their parents have been doing to make a living for their families Children are also encouraged to join clubs at school

or groups about art, music or whatever they like to find out about their own talents,

or just to discover their own values They don’t really care about their children’s study at school, as long as their score reports are acceptable

At the age of 12, children will do a test to find out what they like to do in the future (Or career guiding tests for short) Teachers will contact students’ parents to give students a

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tour at their own parents’ workplaces From tours like that, students can find out what they like to do in the future

*From the age of 13 to 19

Teenagers at this stage can babysit at neighbors’ homes in order to get some money for their own (Which is really popular right now in the US) Receiving weekly allowance like this will provide them a fund for further study and prepare for

financial independence as well Love is allowed in this period, but they must be in control Even though parents let their children to fall for someone It is necessary for parents to get to know the “stranger” who is dating their beloved child to give their children useful advices After finishing High School, a child can decide

whether to work right away or sitting down for the SAT test (A test which is quite like the GCSE test) Parents will only give their children advices which they believe are good for their children But after all, even if they like it or not, they will support their children with a hundred percent and encourage their beloved children to follow their dreams By the law, at the age of 18, a young adult can decide his/her own fate, so that is everything a good father or mother can do for their little children

2.3 Differences

*From the age of 1 to 5

While lullaby songs are quite popular in Vietnam, bed time stories (Or fairy tales) are more preferred in America “Tough Love” may be the way that we do to teach a child at this period in Vietnam, but parents in America would love to sit down for hours and talk with their children about what they can or can’t do and persuade them to do it You can also recognize that a child in the US will always have their own room at the age of 4, while some children in Vietnam still sleep with their parents on the same bed every night

*From the age of 6 to 12

First and foremost, we can see that a child can have full independence about

studying at school, controlling their room and even the right to earn some money for their own in the

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US Parents don’t put too much weight on their children’s shoulders about marks in tests or how well they perform at school Extra class is also not existed in the mind

of parents, which give them more time to communicate with their children They focus on finding the talents of their children and develop them, or just help their children finding out what they truly like to do

In Vietnam, on the other hand, parents are focusing more on lessons at school They believe that red marks on tests are the only measures for the studying process

of their children With the hope for their children to get mark 10 in every single tests, parents send their children to extra classes whenever it is not school time That

is the reason why generation gap is created in this period

*From the age of 13 to 19

While a 13 year old child in Vietnam is still considered to be too small for

anything A child at the same age in the US can have the right to babysit someone for money Babysitting, while being a popular part time job, is also considered as a

“parenting simulator” It is believed that it will help teenagers to understand how hard it is for their parents to take care of them Teenagers at this stage in America are also encouraged to get to know better about their interests in life besides

learning at school

At the age of 18, teenagers in Vietnam get into the GCSE test, which is believed as the most important test ever in the minds of parents Parents mostly will tell their children to take the test rather than graduating then starting to find a job If the child fails to pass the test or his score is not enough to attend an university that they want, their parents usually persuade them to do it again next year In America, at the age

of 19, children is allowed to choose, whether to take the SAT test, or find a job right